#cod

There are 10 kinds of people in the world: those who understand binary numerals, and those who don't. ↗

— Ian Stewart

#computers #humor #humor

Doug returned five minutes later and shook his head. "Sorry kid. She's single, but she doesn't think you're her type. She's into the Goth and vampire scene. You're too mainstream for her." I was sipping a glass of water and nearly choked on it. "That," said Peter, as soon as Doug was gone, "is what we call irony." "How is that possible?" exclaimed Cody. "I am a vampire. I should be exactly what she wants." "Yeah, but you don't look like one," I said. If Gabrielle had been a Trekkie, he might have had a shot tonight. ↗

— Richelle Mead

#humor #humor

Hey, check this weirdo out." Hi was inspecting a bust on the mantel. "This face is ninety percent eyebrow. What do you want to bet he owned slaves?" Scowling to match the carving's expression, Hi spoke in a gravelly voice. "In my day, we ate the poor people. We had a giant outdoor grill, and we cooked up peasant steaks every Sunday." ↗

— Kathy Reichs

#funny #hi #humor #kathy-reichs #poor-people

My life is a code within a code, and I’ll crack both like two eggs and eat my existence like an omelet. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#existence #funny #omelet #funny

It was a good thing Ridge was mighty fond of Tug or he’d probably have killed him by now. As it was, it had been touch and go for a little while that morning. But killing your lover on Christmas morning was so…so…heterosexual. ↗

— Josh Lanyon

#funny

Do not start me on The Da Vinci Code ... a novel so bad that it gives bad novels a bad name." (Discussion at Woodruff Auditorium in Lawrence, KS; October 7, 2005.) ↗

— Salman Rushdie

#literary-criticism #novels #the-davinci-code #writing #literary-criticism

There should be a phone service, I thought, something like 1-800-MEDIUM-1.Where an automated voice would direct you. Press one if an object in your home is levitating. Press two if there is ectoplasm oozing out of your walls. Press three if spirits are disrupting your cable service. Press four if you've inherited your mother's psychic abilities. ↗

— Elizabeth Cody Kimmel

#school-spirit #home

What's he doing?" Bethany asked. "He's bowing.'Good day milday." Bethany giggled. "Crocodiles don't bow." "They should when they meet a princess. ↗

— Kerrelyn Sparks

#crocodiles #princess #love

The Tanakh teaches that, “The diligent will rule, while the lazy will be put to forced labor”. Most Jews work for themselves and hire employees instead of being employees. ↗

— H.W. Charles

#money #money-management #secrets #the-money-code #wealth

I have seen nothing and nothing but death and destruction. Creation yes, but more death than birth. Mankind has learned nothing from their forefathers…their ancestors. It is true what they say, history does repeat itself, Delacroix and those after history are left to make history but how can they make history when history has already been made? - Damion Nicodemeus; Chapter 1: Christian’s Training ↗

— S.C. Parris

#dialogue #history #history-repeating-itself #inspirational #the-dark-world