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Funny Bashes

Read funny quotes and bashes for your daily quick-witted sayings


That tattoo you have of your daughters name surrounded by demons and dragons sure is a lovely tribute to her, mate.


#idocy  


Some of your tweets are so wonderfully strange, I think I'm on LSD instead of DSL


#wrinkly  


Life would be simpler if pants really caught on fire.


#wtf  


Pitt Bull really wanted a RedBull, but he couldn't find one because dogs are color blind.


#funny  


Your first love is unforgettable.


#statement  


If you have to ask if it was good for her…it wasn’t


#love  


Swingers always bail out of real relationships.



Never stop learning, because life never stops teaching.


#wisdom  


When someone pees while they’re on the phone with you, you know they really like you.



I take my fun seriously.



In a world of lazers, the man with the mirror is God.


#idocy  


No matter how "busy" a persons day might be. If they "really care", they'll always find time for you.


#statement  


My health insurance is so bad, my doctor was only allowed to perform a semicolonoscopy on me.


#idocy  


Strangely enough, the philosophy student came before the chicken AND the egg.


#amazing  


It's weird how you can go from talking everyday to not talking at all.


#sad  


To succeed in life, you need two things: ignorance and confidence.



I want a PBJ sandwich but I want you to make it. Yes, you.


#idocy  


This cat is clearly a genius. http://t.co/OqkrrvIx


#funny  


My internet is too slow today. Does anyone know that Morse code stuff?


#internet  


The worst mental illness is love.


#love  



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