#o

Now I know this is going to seem counter to every instinct that you have, but I'm going to ask you to sit still, or I'll put you in the trunk. ↗

— Anna White

#funny #humour #jack #jack-to-samara #samara

Asia is an entertainment, Europe is a dream, America is an imprisonment and Rest is a nightmare. ↗

— Santosh Kalwar

#asia #countries #europe #funny #joke

If you listen to the wind very carefully, you'll be able to hear me whisper my love for you. ↗

— Andrew Davidson

#love #love

She wished she could talk as he did. His speech was so quick and easy. It sounded as if he liked her and was not the least afraid she would not like him, though he was only a common moor boy, in patched clothes and with a funny face and a rough, rusty-red head. ↗

— Frances Hodgson Burnett

#the-secret-garden #funny

Robert said, "This is great, huh? Sorry to butt in and everything, but I really need the extra points. For my grade." Ben nodded and tried to smile. Right, for his grade. He probably wanted to get an A++ in social studies instead of just an A+ ↗

— Andrew Clements

#grades #school #funny

Mimi had red hair and blue eyes, and was rather patriotic in her appearance. When the wind blew her hair around, I was always tempted to place my hand over my heart and recite the Pledge of Allegiance. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#patriotic #funny

We walked on the moon. We made footprints somewhere no one else had ever made footprints, and unless someone comes and rubs them out, those footprints will be there forever because there’s no wind. ↗

— Frank Cottrell Boyce

#funny #moon #funny

Vampires have credit cards?" "We're undead, not Amish. ↗

— Jennifer Colgan

#humor #vampires #funny

Love is honesty. Love is a mutual respect for one another. ↗

— Simone Elkeles

#love #respect #love

Christopher throws dandelion head after dandelion head into his bag. It's getting heavy now and his fingers are stained from the work but there are still so many left to kill. His biggest mistake is giving them names. ↗

— Brian Martinez

#funny #odd #quirky #weeds #funny