#or

I may not look like much, but I'm an expert at pretending to be a ninja. ↗

— Darynda Jones

#ninja #humor

Yo, beautiful. Come pop this collar off me.” Natalya hissed, “Are you mad?” “What’s she gonna do? Vivisect me? Imprison me? We’ve got a pact to fulfill,remember?” To Dorada, she cried, “Seriously, sweetheart, shake that mummified ass over here.” Regin kicked the glass. “Lemme the fuck out—” La Dorada swung her head around,peering at Regin with her one eye. “Okay. That’s freaky. Lookit, Gollum, if you spring me, I’ll help you find your Precious. ↗

— Kresley Cole

#funny #gollum #humor #kresley-cole #regin

I'm always happy when I'm surrounded by water, I think I'm a Mermaid or I was a mermaid. The ocean makes me feel really small and it makes me put my whole life into perspective… it humbles you and makes you feel almost like you’ve been baptized. I feel born again when I get out of the ocean. ↗

— Beyoncé Knowles

#humbles #life #mermaid #ocean #perspective

I had a dream about a motorcycle," said Harry, remembering suddenly. "It was flying." Uncle Vernon nearly crashed into the car in front. He turned right around in his seat and yelled at Harry, his face like a gigantic beet with a mustache: "MOTORCYCLES DON'T FLY!" Dudley and Piers sniggered. "I know they don't," said Harry. "It was only a dream. ↗

— J.K. Rowling

#dursley #harry-potter #motorcycle #dreams

I really should come with a warning label. ↗

— Tom Upton

#humor

Once someone dreams a dream, it can't just drop out of existence. But if the dreamer can't remember it, what becomes of it? It lives on in Fantastica, deep under earth. There are forgotten dreams stored in many layers. The deeper one digs, the closer they are. All Fantastica rests on a foundation of forgotten dreams. ↗

— Michael Ende

#dreams

You are essentially who you create yourself to be and all that occurs in your life is the result of your own making. ↗

— Stephen Richards

#mind-body-spirit #mind-power #motivational #new-thought #positive-thinking

Leave behind the passive dreaming of a rose-tinted future. The energy of happiness exists in living today with roots sunk firmly in reality's soil. ↗

— Daisaku Ikeda

#destiny #happiness #humanism #inspirational #karma

If a mute kid swears, should his mother wash his hands with soap? ↗

— Steven Wright

#humor

He doesn't speak for a long time, until I am quiet again. "Sleep," he says. "I'll fight the bad dreams off if they come to get you." "With what?" "My bare hands, obviously. ↗

— Veronica Roth

#beatrice-prior #four #insurgent #tobias-and-tris #tobias-eaton