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Read the best funny quotes and bashes with tag #sex
I think I'm getting sick. What's that stuff you rub on your chest to relieve congestion? Boobs? Yes, boobs. Someone rub their boobs on me.
#sex
If I were a pair of panties, I'd be the ones you threw out the car window on the way home from a one night stand.
#sex
Sent my wife an e-vite to "Party in my pants" for tonight. She responded with a "maybe".
I'll take it.
#sex
I love playing hide the salami! :)
Except when I forget where I hid it and it starts to smell rotten.
I might be doing it wrong :(
#sex
Met my new neighbor and she thinks my boyfriend is my Dad.
Ha, that's funny and disturbing and I already had intimacy issues and shoot me.
#sex
Always take your first dates out to eat ribs, if they can’t get their fingers dirty they’ll never put them where you want them.
#sex
It still pisses me off that I didn't learn that the nerdy girls were the kinky ones in bed until after high school.
#sex
The worst thing that can happen when you invite someone over to "watch a movie" is actually watching a movie.
#sex
