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Useless Bashes

Read the best funny quotes and bashes with tag #useless


People who eat chocolate twice a week turn out to be a bit thinner than those who don’t.



Auf internationalen Länderplaketten wird Spanien mit einem “E” abgekürzt – für Espana.



obsessive neurotics press the elevator button several times, just to verify that the system works



The United States has never lost a war in which mules were used.



Die Autorin Agatha Christie erlangte ihr ungeheurliches Wissen über Gifte, als sie in der Arzneimittelausgabe in einem Krankenhaus während des Ersten Weltkrieges arbeitete.



FUN FACT: The inventor of the watch accidentally invented hypnotism while presenting to the patent office.



In den Anden wird die Zeit oft daran gemessen, wie lange es dauert eine Zigarette zu rauchen.



Dark Side of the moon (ein Pink Floyd Album) blieb 741 Wochen auf den Top 200 Billboard Charts – das sind 14 Jahre.



Growing up, my mom said I'd never be a ninja, despite what I tried.

Well guess what Halloween costume just came in the mail, mom! SUCK IT!


#useless  


Barbie has lost a lot of her luster since her breast reduction surgery.


#useless  


Abraham Lincoln's mother died when the family dairy cow ate white snakeroot and Ms. Lincoln drank the milk.



The characters Bert and Ernie on Sesame Street were named after Bert the cop and Ernie the taxi driver in Frank Capra's "Its A Wonderful Life"



The verb "cleave" is the only English word with two synonyms which are antonyms of each other: adhere and separate.



I feel sorry for people who aren't smart enough to talk to their pets.


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63% of restaurant workers say they have handled or served food while sick.



Sometime after the end of the Second Wizarding War, Ron and Hermione married and had two children, Rose and Hugo Weasley.



Why can't twitter just read my mind and post my thoughts?


#useless  


"Psychologists say a crush only lasts for 4 months - when feelings last longer, you are considered to be "in love." #UberFacts



Shaving, because nobody likes to find hair in their meal.


#useless  


In China, a man hired virtual 'assassins' to kill his son's World of Warcraft character to stop him playing.




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