#air

So you would literally take a bullet for me." "No," Claire said, with zero emotion. "No?" Ryan said, surprised at her answer. Claire rolled her eyes, annoyed that she had to answer. "If I have time to stand in the way of a bullet, you have time to move. ↗

— Jamie McGuire

#humor #humor

Where are you going?” “To get a Coke!” “Would you—” “No! ↗

— Rachel Caine

#humor

Everything rests on the poisoned wine. If it were just the queen, I could force it down her gullet, but Declan Broekhart would run me through with that damned ceremonial sword, and if his wife's stares were daggers, he'd be dead already. ↗

— Eoin Colfer

#humor #humor

If you ever find yourself in the wrong story, leave. ↗

— Mo Willems

#humor #humorous #philosophy #psychology #humor

Peaseblossom-decorous, proper Peaseblossom-dropped her trousers to waggle her naked, pale bottom at the Stage Manager. Bertie laughed involuntarily, choked on her coffee, and nearly died as it came out her nose, but it was worth the searing pain in her nostrils to see the look on the Stage Manager's face. ↗

— Lisa Mantchev

#fairies #humor #humor

I'd blurted out the question only to keep him from noticing that I was working my hands free, but the Warden behind me, some young brown-haired surfer dude, yelled a warning. "She's getting loose!" Narc. ↗

— Rachel Caine

#rachel-caine #thin-air #humor

I wrestled futilely, then relaxed as a vine wrapped three times around my throat and squeezed. Right," I choked out, and shut my eyes. "I'll wait here, then. ↗

— Rachel Caine

#rachel-caine #thin-air #humor

Maybe I didn't try as hard as I ought when he started calling you names. Serves him right, the nasty old turd. Punch him again, Moth" - Peaseblossom ↗

— Lisa Mantchev

#fairies #humor #humor

Well I am still not drunk" I straightened up against the pillows as best I could. "You told me once that if you could still stand up, you weren't drunk." You aren't standing up." he point out. You are. ↗

— Diana Gabaldon

#humor

It is a peculiar part of the good photographer's adventure to know where luck is most likely to lie in the stream, to hook it, and to bring it in without unfair play and without too much subduing it. ↗

— James Agee

#bring #fair play #good #hook #know