#andre

This doesn't mean you're getting a discount." Audrey heaved a mock sigh. "Oh well. I guess I'll have to ply you with sexual favors, then." Gnome choked on the soup. "I'm old enough to be your grandfather!" Audrey winked at him, gathering the empty bags. "But you're not. ↗

— Ilona Andrews

#fate-s-edge #funny #gnome #ilona-andrews #the-edge

Let me also say I wanna make you sandwhiches, And soup, And peanut butter cookies, Though, the truth is peanutbutter is actually really bad for you 'cause they grow peanuts in old cotton fields to clean the toxins out of the soil, But hey, you like peanutbutter and I like you! ↗

— Andrea Gibson

#love #poem #love

May I say that I am delighted that my favorite alpha is feeling better. Why, you'll be running recklessly into danger against overwhelming odds anytime now. ↗

— Ilona Andrews

#kate #ilona-andrews

I got a dog-training book. It says Grendel needs mental stimulation, so I tried to train him, but I think he must be retarded. ↗

— Ilona Andrews

#grendel #kate #ilona-andrews

The phone rang. I picked it up. "Kate Daniels" "It's me," Curran said. "I—" I hung up. ↗

— Ilona Andrews

#ilona-andrews

I turned and bumped by head against his chest a few times. It was the nearest hard surface. ↗

— Ilona Andrews

#ilona-andrews

What do you mean fainted? Took a dive, kissed the pavement. Swooned like a southern belle after her first kiss. Had a dreadful case of the vapors. ↗

— Ilona Andrews

#kate #ilona-andrews

Everybody has something, that one thing they must do to feel happy. I think this is yours, and I want you to be happy. You don’t have to do it, but it’s here if you choose to come back to it. ↗

— Ilona Andrews

#happiness #happy #job #something #work

I sighed and put Slayer between the front seats. "Stay here. Guard the car." Saiman shut the door. "Is the sword sentient?" "No. But I like to pretend it is. ↗

— Ilona Andrews

#magic-strikes #saiman #ilona-andrews

does you costume involve leather?" she'd asked. and he'd said, "Actually, yeah, it might." it really did. it involved a leather dog collar, leather pants and a leash, and the leash was held by Ysandre, who was in skintight red rubber, from neck to knee high boots. she'd topped it off with a pair of devil horns and a red tridant. she'd made Shane her dog, complete with furry dog mask. ***"Breathe," Myrnin said. "I'm not much for it myself, but i hear it's quite good for humans."*** ↗

— Rachel Caine

#costume-party #feast-of-fools #humor #myrnin #shane-collins