#arts

A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.' ↗

— Tommy Cooper

#around #assistant #blind #bloke #calls

It is a truth universally acknowledged that as soon as one part of your life starts looking up, another falls to pieces. ↗

— Helen Fielding

#another #falls #life #looking #part

The prudence of the best heads is often defeated by the tenderness of the best hearts. ↗

— Henry Fielding

#defeated #heads #hearts #often #prudence

The Navy's paid for you to go through school, and then they need doctors to go out and take care of people who are in various different parts of the world. I decided to pay back my time first as an undersea medical officer. I was stationed in Scotland. ↗

— Laurel Clark

#care #decided #different #different parts #doctors

I do not think men have more talent. There are a great many women in the arts; novelists, painters, sculptors, poets-but the proportion is far lower in the field of song writing. ↗

— Dorothy Fields

#far #field #great #i #i do

I like all things grammatical, and I had already written several books about parts of speech, and even the alphabet, so everything that makes up a sentence and even a word was covered except for punctuation. ↗

— Brian P. Cleary

#all things #alphabet #already #books #covered

The Conservative Party is not honouring the commitment to Lords reform and, as a result, part of our contract has now been broken. Clearly I cannot permit a situation where Conservative rebels can pick and choose the parts of the contract they like, while Liberal Democrat MPs are bound to the entire agreement. ↗

— Nick Clegg

#been #bound #broken #cannot #choose

It's not like I don't want to play the guy next door. But sometimes they're not the best written or the most complicated. But I am very, very particular about my bad boys. There are certain types of characters I will not play. I've said no so many times to so many parts that are just way too dark. You have to be careful. ↗

— Kim Coates

#am #bad #be careful #best #careful

It's funny. Some people remember that a lot more than I do. I remember certain parts of it, and if everybody who mentioned that to me had been to the game who said they were at the game, there'd be 800,000 people at that game, I think. ↗

— Carlton Fisk

#certain #everybody #funny #game #had

To dare to live alone is the rarest courage; since there are many who had rather meet their bitterest enemy in the field, than their own hearts in their closet. ↗

— Charles Caleb Colton

#bitterest #closet #courage #dare #enemy