#ash

you are what you wear ↗

— Treasure Stitches

#fragrance #humor #style #humor

Why are there so many people out here?' Boomer asked as we bobbed and weaved roughly forward. 'Christmas shopping.' I explained. 'Already? Isn't it early to returning things?' I really had no sense of how his mind worked. ↗

— David Levithan

#christmas-shopping #dash #humor #lol #no-sense

I know it's practical for career women, but sneakers with suits? Jesus couldn't possibly weep harder than I did. ↗

— MaryJanice Davidson

#fashion #humor #vampires #humor

One has to be proactive in warding off ugly, and that costs money. ↗

— Kristin Billerbeck

#humor

You can’t has,' he whispered softly, 'not yours. ↗

— Wil Wheaton

#fantasy #geekery #humor #humor

Jenna slipped in wearing an outfit that I can only describe as Hello Kitty Goes Goth. ↗

— Rachel Hawkins

#humor #humor

Wait until you see my socratic method, baby. ↗

— Cherrie Lynn

#humor #unleashed #humor

Gorgeous,” he murmured. She chuckled. “Think you’l say that in five months or so? When I waddle like a duck and you have to tie my shoes for me?” “I’l say it then and forever. ↗

— Cherrie Lynn

#humor #unleashed #humor

In all, his outfit required nearly two thousand man-years of research and development, eight barrels of oil, and sixteen patent and trademark infringement lawsuits. All so he could possess casual style. A style that, in logistical requirements, was comparable to fielding a nineteenth-century military brigade. But he looked good. Casual. ↗

— Daniel Suarez

#humor #humor

He punched me in the face," Ash said, who understandably did not seem to find the situation humorous at all. "And then he yelled at me for sleeping with our personal trainer!" "I was told breakup scenes were a good way to distract people," Jared said with beautiful simplicity. "Ash looked so surprised," Holly said. "He had no idea what was going on. He said, 'I didn't sleep with our personal trainer! We don't even have a personal trainer!'" Angela and Holly giggled. Ash held the back of his hand to his bleeding mouth and glared. Jared was still grinning like a maniac. "In that case," he told Ash solemnly, "I will consider taking you back. ↗

— Sarah Rees Brennan

#ash #break-ups #cousins #distractions #holly