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Well-known, alas, is the case of the poor German who was very fond of three and who made each aspect of his life a thing of triads. He went home one evening and drank three cups of tea with three lumps of sugar in each cup, cut his jugular with a razor three times and scrawled with a dying hand on a picture of his wife good-bye, good-bye, good-bye. ↗
#last-lines #suicide #three #death
Tucked inside the moments of this great sadness - this feeling of being punctured, scrambling and stricken - were also moments of the brightest, most swollen and logic shattering happiness I've ever experienced. One moment would be a wall of happiness so tall it could not be scaled; the next felt like falling into a pit of sadness that had no bottom. I realized you could not have one without the other, that this great capacity to love and be happy can be experienced only with this great risk of having happiness taken from you - to tremble, always, on the edge of loss. ↗
You might be looking forward to working, falling in love, marrying, raising a family. You are told that you should expect to find a job paying so much, where your hours are so much, where your responsibilities are so much. That is what is expected of you. And if you live up to it, it will be an awful waste. If you expect that, you will be limiting yourself. ↗
Compruebo también, a través de nuestras conversaciones, que estamos libres de fetichismos, de supersticiones, de falsos sentimentalismos, y que, para bien y para mal, vemos la muerte no como una culminación y un tránsito hacia otro lugar, sino de esa forma a la vez descarnada y sin consuelo a la que la ha reducido la historia moderna: un hecho simple, natural, tan aleatorio como la vida misma. Lo único que podemos hacer ahora para sacarla de su condición de acto animal es recurrir a un ritual de despedida suficientemente hermoso que tenga que ver con el mismo Daniel y con aquello en lo que nosotros creemos. Y a eso nos disponemos. ↗
My parents say you’re no good, Elijah.” I exhaled and killed the cigarette in the grass. Laughing, Eli’s eyes went to my lips and his hands touched my bare midriff. “Really? And what do you say?” He had brought his lips so close to mine that it became hard to think about my next words when all I wanted to do was crush my mouth to his. I wanted him to completely consume me. “I think you’re broken,” I finally got out, and Eli arched a brow. “But I think I’m broken too. I just don’t know it yet. ↗
#death #discovery #falling-in-love #finding-yourself #growing-up
If, as a culture, we don’t bear witness to grief, the burden of loss is placed entirely upon the bereaved, while the rest of us avert our eyes and wait for those in mourning to stop being sad, to let go, to move on, to cheer up. And if they don’t — if they have loved too deeply, if they do wake each morning thinking, I cannot continue to live — well, then we pathologize their pain; we call their suffering a disease. We do not help them: we tell them that they need to get help. ↗
