#children

When God Created Mothers" When the Good Lord was creating mothers, He was into His sixth day of "overtime" when the angel appeared and said. "You're doing a lot of fiddling around on this one." And God said, "Have you read the specs on this order?" She has to be completely washable, but not plastic. Have 180 moveable parts...all replaceable. Run on black coffee and leftovers. Have a lap that disappears when she stands up. A kiss that can cure anything from a broken leg to a disappointed love affair. And six pairs of hands." The angel shook her head slowly and said. "Six pairs of hands.... no way." It's not the hands that are causing me problems," God remarked, "it's the three pairs of eyes that mothers have to have." That's on the standard model?" asked the angel. God nodded. One pair that sees through closed doors when she asks, 'What are you kids doing in there?' when she already knows. Another here in the back of her head that sees what she shouldn't but what she has to know, and of course the ones here in front that can look at a child when he goofs up and say. 'I understand and I love you' without so much as uttering a word." God," said the angel touching his sleeve gently, "Get some rest tomorrow...." I can't," said God, "I'm so close to creating something so close to myself. Already I have one who heals herself when she is sick...can feed a family of six on one pound of hamburger...and can get a nine year old to stand under a shower." The angel circled the model of a mother very slowly. "It's too soft," she sighed. But tough!" said God excitedly. "You can imagine what this mother can do or endure." Can it think?" Not only can it think, but it can reason and compromise," said the Creator. Finally, the angel bent over and ran her finger across the cheek. There's a leak," she pronounced. "I told You that You were trying to put too much into this model." It's not a leak," said the Lord, "It's a tear." What's it for?" It's for joy, sadness, disappointment, pain, loneliness, and pride." You are a genius, " said the angel. Somberly, God said, "I didn't put it there. ↗

— Erma Bombeck

#family #humor #love #mothers #mothers-day

Women are treated differently by society for exactly the same reason that children and the mentally handicapped are treated differently. ↗

— Scott Adams

#differently #exactly #handicapped #mentally #reason

In the end of five years I made supplication to the king to go out of this land, desiring to see my poor wife and children according to conscience and nature. ↗

— William Adams

#children #conscience #desiring #end #five

I think all of us as women have this super-human quality. We create life, we give life, we are the sources of life for our children - we're all pretty bionic. ↗

— Christina Aguilera

#create #give #i #i think #life

When I learned how millions of children go to bed hungry, my only response was, 'What can I do to help?' ↗

— Christina Aguilera

#children #go #help #how #hungry

If you were not a sinful, polluted, helpless, and miserable creature, this Savior would not be suited to you, and you would not be comprehended in his gracious invitations to the children of men. ↗

— Archibald Alexander

#comprehended #creature #gracious #helpless #his

My only purpose is to teach children to rebel against authority figures. ↗

— Sherman Alexie

#authority #authority figures #children #figures #only

Head Start is designed to ensure that all children - regardless of their family's income, race, or ethnic background - are able to enter kindergarten ready to learn. ↗

— Lucille Roybal-Allard

#background #children #designed #ensure #enter

If you love your children, if you love your country, if you love the God of love, clear your hands from slaves, burden not your children or your country with them. ↗

— Richard V. Allen

#children #clear #country #god #hands

I think we have a moral obligation to our children that can be easily summarized: number one, protect them from harm. ↗

— Tom Allen

#easily #harm #i #i think #moral