#ge

The news that comes out of Pakistan is always geared toward terrorism and fundamentalism. But when you give people freedom of expression and the freedom to go out and be social and to express themselves, you will see a change. I see that coming about in my country. ↗

— Sharmeen Obaid-Chinoy

#always #change #comes #coming #country

The young boys I speak with say to me: Why would I want to live in this world - where they rely on charity, dry pieces of bread and water, where they are subjected to harsh treatment, when they can be free and be the envy of their colleagues in the afterlife. They are only too eager to sign on the dotted line and join the ranks of the Taliban. ↗

— Sharmeen Obaid-Chinoy

#bread #charity #colleagues #dotted #dry

This Halloween, the most popular mask is the Arnold Schwarzenegger mask. And the best part? With a mouth full of candy you will sound just like him. ↗

— Conan O'Brien

#arnold schwarzenegger #best #best part #candy #full

During last night's debate, John Kerry and John Edwards were so friendly to each other some political experts think that they may end up running together. In fact Kerry and Edwards were so friendly, President Bush accused them of planning a gay marriage. ↗

— Conan O'Brien

#bush #debate #during #each #edwards

Earlier today, Arnold Schwarzenegger criticized the California school system, calling it disastrous. Arnold says California's schools are so bad that its graduates are willing to vote for me. ↗

— Conan O'Brien

#arnold #arnold schwarzenegger #bad #california #calling

In New York, we had primary elections for mayor. To improve their chances, all five candidates changed their name to Rudy Giuliani. ↗

— Conan O'Brien

#chances #changed #elections #five #had

Officials at the White House are saying that President Bush hasn't changed his schedule much since the war started. The main difference, they say, is that he's started watching the news and taping Sponge Bob. ↗

— Conan O'Brien

#bush #changed #difference #hasn #his

President Clinton signed a $10 million deal to write a book by 2003. Isn't that amazing? Yes, and get this, not only that, President Bush signed a $10 million deal to read a book by 2003. ↗

— Conan O'Brien

#book #bush #clinton #deal #get

Scientists announced that they have located the gene for alcoholism. Scientists say they found it at a party, talking way too loudly. ↗

— Conan O'Brien

#announced #found #gene #located #loudly

Yesterday, the Pentagon warned U.S. reporters that they should get out of Baghdad as soon as possible because the U.S. could attack at any time. Then the Pentagon added, 'Whatever you do, don't tell Geraldo.' ↗

— Conan O'Brien

#any #attack #baghdad #because #could