#heating

I used to date the lead singer of The Cranberries, but she cheated on me. Turns out she had some turkey on the side. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#cranberries #dating #funny #humor #music

I know my vision is impaired and cannot be trusted with even the simplest tasks, much less dating. Not that I´ve come within talon distance of a man. ↗

— Suzanne Finnamore

#cheating #deception #divorce #infidelity #marriage

You didn't just cheat on me; you cheated on us. You didn't just break my heart; you broke our future. ↗

— Steve Maraboli

#cheat #cheated #cheating #future #happiness

I would have been a black belt in Karate much sooner, but the store was sold out of Sharpie markers. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #karate #funny

I wrote a thesis on love, and I wrote it in lipstick. Of course, I also got blood on the paper, because the lipstick was still attached to her cheating lips. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #lipstick #love #thesis #funny

I want to write a song about retaliation called, "Oh Yeah, and I Faked Every Orgasm...While You Were Out of Town. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #relationships #retaliation #revenge

Although I notice there is never a truly good time to have a nice long chat with one´s mother-in-law, unless you are having an extraordinary life and marriage and your mother-in-law is, say, Maureen Dowd, or Indira Gandhi. Someone of that ilk. ↗

— Suzanne Finnamore

#cheating #deception #divorce #infidelity #marriage

Well, when I think of steroids I think of an image. You have the advantage over someone, which is a form of cheating. I guess it wouldn't be right unless it was legal for everybody. Reason it's not legal for everybody is because it can hurt people seriously. ↗

— Evander Holyfield

#because #cheating #everybody #form #guess

For far too long, America has been without a comprehensive energy plan, and today consumers are paying the price - literally - at the pump and in their heating bills. ↗

— Chris Chocola

#been #bills #comprehensive #consumers #energy

Heartbreak is good fuel for country songs. And cheating. ↗

— Miranda Lambert

#country #fuel #good #heartbreak #songs