#hood

That scent she threw off was not anything by Chanel. Unless they’d recently added a Tragedy line. ↗

— J.R. Ward

#humor #humor

I'm going to stay here and see if he comes back," Wrath said as the double doors opened and V strode in. "I want the rest of you out searching for him in the city, but before you go, first let's get an update from our very own Katie Couric." He nodded at Vishous. "Katie?" V's glare was the ocular version of a fully extended middle finger ↗

— J.R. Ward

#humor #wrath #humor

After you are here, I will try not to become one of those parents who brag incessantly about their children, who force them to recite the alphabet backward or sing the Lord's Prayer in German to horrified dinner guests. One of those parents who tell people who aren't interested and haven't askd what their progeny's grade-point average is, what school they go to, how handsome and brilliant and psychic they are. If something goes awry and I do become one of those parents, you have my permission to sneak into my bedroom while I am sleeping and pinch my nostrils shut. ↗

— Suzanne Finnamore

#parenthood #humor

Your pants didn't get smaller, Mommy," I assured her. "Your butt got bigger. ↗

— Gordon Korman

#humor #silly #humor

We grow up opposing our parents only to become like them enough to oppose our children who behave as we once did—a reminder of how dreadful we were toward those now vindicated grandparents. And you thought God had no sense of humor. ↗

— Richelle E. Goodrich

#god #karma #learning #parenthood #parents

...there is the sheer emotional, intellectual, physical, chemical pleasure of your children. The honest truth is that the world holds no greater gratification than lying in bed with your children, putting your leg on top of them in a semi-crushing manner, while saying sternly, "You are a poo. ↗

— Caitlin Moran

#motherhood #humor

Gallows humor is part of having a doctor in the house. Deal with it. ↗

— J.R. Ward

#humor #lover-enshrined #medicine #humor

Forget Jack, I'm in love with the cold, dirt floor. ↗

— Ann Brashares

#bridget #humor #sisterhood #humor

In our country we call this type of mother love teng ai. My son has told me that in men's writing it is composed of two characters. The first means pain; the second means love. That is a mother's love. ↗

— Lisa See

#unconditional-love #love

I looked on child rearing not only as a work of love & duty but as a profession that was fully as interesting & challenging as any honorable profession in the world and one that demanded the best that I could bring to it. ↗

— Rose Kennedy

#love