#male

Curse you, cheap beer. Must find miso in tiny packet. ↗

— MCM

#hangover #humor #malediction #humor

Next time!" In what calendar are kept the records of those next times which never come? ↗

— Helen Hunt Jackson

#calendar #california #female-author #future #helen-hunt-jackson

He cried when I left, which I find to be standard male behavior. ↗

— Emilie Autumn

#male #behavior

The female form provides the solution in which the essence itself is held; she is passio, and acted upon, the male is actio, the mover. ↗

— Marina Warner

#feminism #gender #grammar #male #grammar

by and large,mothers and house wives are the only workers who do not have regular time off.They are the great vacationless class ↗

— Anne Morrow Lindbergh

#job #motherhood #motherhood

He rips his mouth from mine as he growls, "Mine. Only mine. Only. Ever. Mine," still slamming into me, pounding me against the wall. ↗

— Mia Sheridan

#love

He had never thought in his wildest imagination of marriage as an option for him. Never believed there was a woman out there that would make him sign up for that particular brand of madness. And, in the abstract at least, it still sounded like madness but this wasn’t about marriage, it was about Riley. With her, he knew that boyfriend-girlfriend shit wasn’t going to be enough. He had to have her locked down. ↗

— Nia Forrester

#angsty-love #commitment #marriage #proposal #riley

Where's Magnus?" he said. AS he looked toward the kitchen, Clary saw a bruise on his jaw, below his ear, about the size of a thumbprint. "Alec!" Magnus came skidding into the living room and blew a kiss to his boyfriend across the room. Having discarded his slippers, he was barefoot now. His cat's eyes shone as he looked at Alec. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#alec #awww #magnus-bane #malec #magnus-bane

Instead of replying, Alec reached down and took Magnus's hands. Magnus let Alec pull him to his feet, a questioning look in his eyes. Before he could say anything, Alec drew him closer and kissed him. Magnus made a soft, pleased sound, and gripped the back of Alec's shirt, rucking it up, his fingers cool on Alec's spine. Alec leaned into him, pinning Magnus between the table and his own body. Not that Magnus seemed to mind. 'Come on,' Alec said against Magnus's ear. 'It's late. Let's go to bed. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#malec #magnus-bane

He looks again towards the door, expecting Mum to walk in and remind him of something he's forgotten. He smiles awkwardly. 'Is that it, Dad? I've got to go.' 'Your Mum said I should mention ... um ... satisfaction.' 'What!' 'She said young men should know things, should be told things so that the girl won't be ...' his eyes plead for understanding, '... disappointed.' [...] 'No worries, Dad. My biology teacher said I was a natural.' Dad looks confused. 'I'm kidding, Dad.' [...] Poor bloke, having to do the dirty work while Mum's off with her gang. 'Dad? What did Grandpa tell you about sex?' 'He said if I got a girl pregnant, he'd kill me. ↗

— Steven Herrick

#female-satisfaction #funny #sex-talk #funny