#eye

The Immovable Object can also be construed as an idea whose time has come. It’s an idea of proportions that the human mind can only grasp a small portion. Like the idea of freedom during the days of revolution—only a handful understand what it means for the long term, but it’s the idea that cause people to take up arms, revolt against the ruling class and fight for what they perceive to be freedom. ↗

— Carla R. Herrera

#freedom

Imperio!” Moody jerked his wand, and the spider rose onto two of its hind legs and went into what was unmistakably a tap dance. Everyone was laughing — everyone except Moody. “Think it’s funny, do you?” he growled. “You’d like it, would you, if I did it to you?” The laughter died away almost instantly. ↗

— J.K. Rowling

#mad-eye-moody #spells #spiders #tap-dance #funny

This is a theater," Bertie, annoyed by the inquisition, dropped him onto stage. Several feet of slack cable landed atop the fairy in a slithering heap. "Oh!" Peaseblossom said. "You've buried him alive! ↗

— Lisa Mantchev

#eyes-like-stars #funny #lisa-mantchev #mustardseed #peaseblossom

I was hot so I gave myself a haircut. I then saw a bald man sweating, so I offered to tweeze his eyebrows. He accepted and was so grateful that he offered to trade mustaches with me. In remembrance of that special bonding moment, I still wear his mustache over my left nipple.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bald #baldness #bond #bonding #eyebrows

I'm sure I'll feel much more grateful when I find a guy who thinks complex wiring in a girl is a turn-on. ↗

— Marissa Meyer

#cyborg #girl #humor #marissa-meyer #humor

Um," Doc said in a mild voice, "medically speaking, I'm not sure that was the most helpful thing for his condition." "But I feel better," Jared answered, sullen. Doc smiled the tiniest smile. "Well, maybe a few more minutes of unconsciousness won't kill him. ↗

— Stephenie Meyer

#jared #stephenie-meyer #the-host #humor

A good friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend will be sitting next to you Saying, 'Damn. We fucked up. ↗

— Cheyenne McCray

#demons-not-included #humor #humor

I know you’re rolling your eyes at me,” he murmurs, and I hear the trace of humor in his voice. ↗

— E.L. James

#christian-grey #humor #rolling-eyes #humor

His tiny, naked butt disappeared into the stream as he cried, "Wheeeee! Balls out!" I think that's a rugby reference," Bertie said. "But don't quote me on that. ↗

— Lisa Mantchev

#humor #mustardseed #humor

Peaseblossom-decorous, proper Peaseblossom-dropped her trousers to waggle her naked, pale bottom at the Stage Manager. Bertie laughed involuntarily, choked on her coffee, and nearly died as it came out her nose, but it was worth the searing pain in her nostrils to see the look on the Stage Manager's face. ↗

— Lisa Mantchev

#fairies #humor #humor