#moo

I see myself as Rhoda, not Mary Tyler Moore. ↗

— Iris Murdoch

#i see #mary #mary tyler moore #moore #myself

Here follows the substance of what I said, written out entirely for your benefit. Pay attention to it, or you will be all abroad, when we get deeper into the story. Clear your mind of the children, or the dinner, or the new bonnet, or what not. Try if you can't forget politics, horses, prices in the city and grievances at the club. I hope you won't take this freedom on my part amiss; it's only a way I have of appealing to a gentle reader. Lord! haven't I seen you with the greatest authors in your hands, and don't I know how ready your attention is to wander when it's a book that asks for it, instead of a person? ↗

— Wilkie Collins

#freedom

You think me noble?” She rolled to her side facing him. “Am I saint-like? Do I slay dragons and hang the moon as well? ↗

— Jessica Fortunato

#moon #noble #sacrifice #saint #friendship

Did you know it takes more muscles to frown than it does to smile? I know, because yesterday was in a bad mood, and I guess I must have frowned too much because this morning I woke up with a torn groin muscle. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#frown #funny #groin #smile #funny

Imperio!” Moody jerked his wand, and the spider rose onto two of its hind legs and went into what was unmistakably a tap dance. Everyone was laughing — everyone except Moody. “Think it’s funny, do you?” he growled. “You’d like it, would you, if I did it to you?” The laughter died away almost instantly. ↗

— J.K. Rowling

#mad-eye-moody #spells #spiders #tap-dance #funny

Try not to trip," she added. "We don't have time for a concussion today." I groaned. That would be just like me - ruin everything, destroy the world, in a moment of klutziness. ↗

— Stephenie Meyer

#bella-swan #funny #new-moon #twilight-saga #funny

She put her hand on her hip. "Where are you going?" "To the boat. You called me Lord Bill again. That means we're cool." Cerise slapped her forehead with the heel of her hand and followed him. ↗

— Ilona Andrews

#cerise #funny #ilona-andrews #lord-bill #the-edge

We walked on the moon. We made footprints somewhere no one else had ever made footprints, and unless someone comes and rubs them out, those footprints will be there forever because there’s no wind. ↗

— Frank Cottrell Boyce

#funny #moon #funny

You can't trust vampires, trust me ↗

— Stephenie Meyer

#movie-quote #new-moon #twilight #twilight-quote #funny

Oh. My. God.’ she said, pointing out of the window. ‘Do you know what that is?’ I nodded and said, ‘I think I may have seen it before.’ ‘That,’ said Florida, ‘is the Moonyouidiot. ↗

— Frank Cottrell Boyce

#the-moon #funny