#ps

When we got to the moron who was sitting in the only path to the stairway, Adam caught my waist and lifted me over before stepping over the man himself. “Scott?” Adam said as we headed upstairs. “Yeah?” “Unless someone shoots you, skins you, and throws the results on the floor, I don’t want to see you lying in the walkway again.” “Yessir! ↗

— Patricia Briggs

#humor #mercy-thompson #silver-borne #threats #humor

We may run into Kevin,” Lucy said gloomily. “She’s hoping to run into Kevin,” Zoë assured her. Justine smiled grimly. “Preferably with my car. ↗

— Lisa Kleypas

#friendships #humor #friendship

I can rap in a London accent, make weird faces, wear spandex, wigs, and black lipstick. I can be more creative than the average male rapper. ↗

— Nicki Minaj

#average #black #creative #faces #i

People complain because roses have thorns; I am thankful that thorns have roses because I have finally learned not to pick them the next time around. ↗

— Shannon L. Alder

#love #relationships #romance #friendship

Oh, you know what bloggers are like, they write and write and write. I don't know why, because they're not being paid. ↗

— Jon Ronson

#psychology #psycopaths #humor

There is something about the Australian psyche that seems to like films that are slightly offbeat. ↗

— Nick Park

#australian #films #like #offbeat #psyche

The very best people are like that. They don't entangle you like flypaper. ↗

— Alan Bradley

#relationships #humor

See if you can spot the difference between these two statements: (a) «Those trousers make your backside look fat.» (b) «You're a repellently obese old hag upon whom I am compelled to heap insults and derision — depressingly far removed from the, 'stupid, squeaky, pocket-sized English women,' who make up my vast catalogue of former lovers and to whom I might as well return right now as I hate everything about you.» Maybe the acoustics were really bad in the dining room, or something. ↗

— Mil Millington

#humor #relationships #humor

I think you still love me, but we can’t escape the fact that I’m not enough for you. I knew this was going to happen. So I’m not blaming you for falling in love with another woman. I’m not angry, either. I should be, but I’m not. I just feel pain. A lot of pain. I thought I could imagine how much this would hurt, but I was wrong. ↗

— Haruki Murakami

#infidelity #love #pain #relationships #imagination

Imagine a society that subjects people to conditions that make them terribly unhappy then gives them the drugs to take away their unhappiness. Science fiction It is already happening to some extent in our own society. Instead of removing the conditions that make people depressed modern society gives them antidepressant drugs. In effect antidepressants are a means of modifying an individual's internal state in such a way as to enable him to tolerate social conditions that he would otherwise find intolerable. ↗

— Theodore Kaczynski

#depression #drugs #pharmaceuticals #psychiatry #psychology