#un

I think it would be funny if some guy walked into a house and said he just stepped in shit. Then he’d ask other people to look at the bottom of his shoes as he lifted each leg and foot so they could see. When all the people said no, they didn't see any shit, he would then take off his shoes and there would be shit all over his socks. Then the guy would say, "Oh, God, my roommate shit in my boot again. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#roommate #stepped-in-shit #funny

I have been able to travel all over the country and see many places that I probably never would have visited. I have also participated in many charity events for worthy causes. ↗

— Rob Mariano

#also #been #causes #charity #country

We dominated Survivor - there is no way we would not dominate that, too. I can see it already, us making deals with people. That's the best part, and with the Race, it would be even more fun because I've got a lot of tricks up my sleeve. ↗

— Rob Mariano

#because #best #best part #deals #dominate

Our Lord did not try to alter circumstances. He submitted to them. They shaped his life and eventually brought him to Calvary. I believe we miss opportunities and lovely secrets our Lord is waiting to teach us by not taking what comes. ↗

— Mother Maribel

#believe #brought #circumstances #comes #did

Our real work is prayer. What good is the cold iron of our frantic little efforts unless first we heat it in the furnace of our prayer? Only heat will diffuse heat. ↗

— Mother Maribel

#cold iron #diffuse #efforts #first #frantic

When he hit a ground ball to you, you knew you had to make a good throw because he was going to be running. ↗

— Juan Marichal

#because #going #good #ground #had

I would walk down the hall with my guitar and play for anyone that would listen. As a young kid I was really driven and I was going to make it happen no matter what. ↗

— Teena Marie

#down #driven #going #guitar #hall

Excuse me?" I said, palms down on the Formica tabletop. "Coffee? I thought we came here for pie." "I don't eat the kind of pie they serve here." I felt a flash of heat go through my stomach. I knew firsthand the kind of pie Ranger liked. ↗

— Janet Evanovich

#romance #stephanie-plum-ranger #funny

Let your eyes talk, mouth listens and ear sleeps. ↗

— Santosh Kalwar

#philosophical #funny

As a team, you need to come from behind every once in awhile just to do it. Good for the attitude. It makes it exciting. And when everybody knows you have to throw it... that makes it fun too. ↗

— Dan Marino

#awhile #behind #come #every #everybody