#which

Telephone, n. An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making a disagreeable person keep his distance. ↗

— Ambrose Bierce

#advantages #devil #disagreeable #distance #his

Deliberation, n.: The act of examining one's bread to determine which side it is buttered on. ↗

— Ambrose Bierce

#bread #buttered #deliberation #determine #examining

Duty - that which sternly impels us in the direction of profit, along the line of desire. ↗

— Ambrose Bierce

#desire #direction #duty #impels #line

Immortality: A toy which people cry for, And on their knees apply for, Dispute, contend and lie for, And if allowed Would be right proud Eternally to die for. ↗

— Ambrose Bierce

#apply #contend #cry #die #dispute

Insurance - an ingenious modern game of chance in which the player is permitted to enjoy the comfortable conviction that he is beating the man who keeps the table. ↗

— Ambrose Bierce

#chance #comfortable #conviction #enjoy #game

Wit - the salt with which the American humorist spoils his intellectual cookery by leaving it out. ↗

— Ambrose Bierce

#american #cookery #his #humorist #intellectual

I had to do the book because there was an unauthorised biography which didn't tell it like it was. ↗

— Cilla Black

#biography #book #had #i #like

I know divers, and divers men know me, which love me as I do them: yet if I should pray them, when I meet them in the street openly, they would abhor me; but if I pray them where they be appointed to meet me secretly, they will hear me and accept my request. ↗

— William Tyndale

#accept #appointed #divers #hear #i

Aching all over, we reached level ground again, and Mr. Christy withdrew his claims, and agreed that no road anywhere else could possibly be so bad as a Mexican road; a decision which later experiences only served to confirm. ↗

— Edward Burnett Tylor

#again #agreed #anywhere #bad #christy

Every one knows how the snow lies in the valleys of the Alps, forming a plain which slopes gradually downward towards the outlet Imagine such a valley ten miles across, with just such a sloping plain, not of snow but of earth. ↗

— Edward Burnett Tylor

#downward #earth #every #forming #gradually