#ale

You do realise modern social mores exist for a reason?" "I was hungry, allowances should be made. ↗

— Gail Carriger

#humor #humor

Jason felt humiliated and frustrated. Rejected by a rock. ↗

— Cinda Williams Chima

#humor #jason-haley #humor

Perhaps not," said Will, who had ears like a bat's. "But I would make a radiant bride. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#humor #sass #will #william-herondale #humor

The Will I fell in love with, she almost said."And be Will," she finished instead. "Or I shall hit you with my umbrella. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#will-herondale #love

He loved her enough to know she was better off without him ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#will-herondale #love

He was the most ordinary man in all the world, and yet in her memory he'd become luminous, like the prince in a fairy tale. ↗

— Cheryl Strayed

#love #memories #romance #love

But-" Maia, still looking over at Alec and Magnus, broke off and raised her eyebrows. Simon turned to see what she was looking at- and stared. Alec had his arms around Magnus and was kissing him, full on the mouth. Magnus, who appeared to be in a state of shock, stood frozen. Several groups of people- Shadowhunters and Downworlders alike- were staring and whispering. Glancing to the side, Simon saw the Lightwoods, their eyes wide, gaping at the display. Maryse had her hand over her mouth. Maia looked perplexed. "Wait a second," she said. "Do we all have to do that, too? ↗

— Cassandra Clare City of Glass

#humor #love #magnus-bane #malec #humor

May the IRS find that you deduct your pet sheep as an entertainment expense. ↗

— Christopher Moore

#humor #insult #irs #malediction #humor

I lean back. "What the hell are you doing?" "What do you mean?" she asks, innocently batting her eyelashes against the hot sun beaming down on us. Is she kidding me? "Where's you toungue?" I ask stupidly. Her wet little eyebrows furrow. "In my mouth. Why, where's it supposed to be? ↗

— Simone Elkeles

#humor #maggie-armstrong #humor

Regweld is really a fine wizard," he continued, patting the shoulder again. "And his ideas for crossbreeding a horse and a frog are not without merit; never mind the explosion! Alchemy shops can be replaced! ↗

— R.A. Salvatore

#fantasy #frog #horse #humor #icewind-dale