#ali

If you pull some lame-ass 'I'm your father' bullshit, right now, I'm going to lose it. ↗

— Martin Leicht

#captive #humor #humor

You have the effrontery to be squeamish, it thought at him. But we were dragons. We were supposed to be cruel, cunning, heartless and terrible. But this much I can tell you, you ape – the great face pressed even closer, so that Wonse was staring into the pitiless depths of his eyes – we never burned and tortured and ripped one another apart and called it morality. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#dark-humor #dragons #morality #humor

If you find an Australian indoors, it's a fair bet that he will have a glass in his hand. ↗

— Jonathan Aitken

#bet #fair #find #glass #hand

My grandmother was a teacher, my sister was a teacher, my daughter was a teacher and is now a superintendent in northern California, and my son-in-law is a high school principal. I am surrounded. ↗

— Loni Anderson

#california #daughter #grandmother #high #high school

That’s sad. How plastic and artificial life has become. It gets harder and harder to find something…real.” Nin interlocked his fingers, and stretched out his arms. “Real love, real friends, real body parts… ↗

— Jess C. Scott

#cyberpunk #materialism #meaning #plastic-surgery #reality

Don't believe those lies about intellectual people. They're only written to soothe the majority. ↗

— E.M. Forster

#humor #intellectualism #humor

Remember you are never really alone. Although it may feel like it for very long stretches of time. ↗

— Steven L. Peck

#existentialism #hell #solitude #humor

There is something about the Australian psyche that seems to like films that are slightly offbeat. ↗

— Nick Park

#australian #films #like #offbeat #psyche

You can't shame a shameless man, you can only remind him of the awesome shit he's done. ↗

— Captain Perverto

#individuality #humor

I wonder if I could eat a child if I had the chance.' 'I doubt if I could cook one,' said Constance. ↗

— Shirley Jackson

#dark-humor #humor #macabre #humor