#candid

I make charts of songs that are good candidates, good targets, so to speak. Then I try to come up with ideas for parodies. And 99% of those ideas are horrible. ↗

— Al Yankovic

#charts #come #good #horrible #i

There are a lot of songs that would ostensibly be a good candidate for parody, yet I can't think of a clever enough idea. ↗

— Al Yankovic

#clever #enough #good #i #idea

The shrieks were coming from two quite naked girls, who were pursued by a pair of apes snapping at their bottoms. [...] So he now raises his double-barrelled Spanish rifle, fires and kills both apes. 'God be praised, my dear Calambo! I have delivered these two poor creatures from grave peril; if it was a sin to kill an Inquisitor and a Jesuit, I have made ample amends by saving the lives of two girls [...]' He was about to continue, but words failed him when he saw the two girls throw their arms lovingly around the two apes and collapse in tears over their corpses, filling the air with the most pitiful lamentations. 'I was not expecting quite so much tenderness of heart,' he said at last to Cacambo, who replied: 'You've excelled yourself this time, Master; you have just despatched the two lovers of these young ladies.' '-Their lovers! Is it possible? You're making fun of me, Cacambo; how could anyone believe in such a thing?' - 'My dear Master,' retorted Cacambo, 'you are always astounished by everything; why do you find it so strange that in some countries it is apes who enjoy the favours of young ladies? After all, they are one-quarter human, just as I am one-quarter Spanish. ↗

— Voltaire

#candide #humor #lovers #shoots #love

I would not run as a one-issue candidate. Anybody who does that is declaring himself to be marginal. ↗

— John Bolton

#candidate #declaring #does #himself #i

It is acceptable to bring someone to tears if it explains to them in an emotional way why a product, a service, or a candidate is the right person, is the right thing to do. ↗

— Frank Luntz

#bring #candidate #emotional #explains #person

I am committed to ensure that our 2008 Republican presidential candidates forthrightly address issues of importance to the African-American community. ↗

— Ken Mehlman

#african-american #african-american community #am #candidates #committed

When I thought about the calibre of people in the room I realized we might just have a credible candidate for Mayor who will would finally enforce the laws of the city. It was almost too good to be true. ↗

— Herbert Baker

#almost #be true #candidate #city #credible

This is what happens, when, for the first time in modern history, a candidate resorts to lawsuits to try to overturn the outcome of an election for president. ↗

— James Baker

#election #first #first time #happens #history

Barack Obama is probably the most exciting candidate that either the Democratic or Republican party has produced at least since I've been around. He's fresh, he's new, he's insightful. ↗

— Joe Biden

#barack #barack obama #been #candidate #democratic

I don't have many litmus tests, but this is one: Any candidate who doesn't understand that we need to balance the budget should not be president of the United States. ↗

— Jim DeMint

#balance #budget #candidate #i #litmus