#drink

It's 4:58 on Friday afternoon. Do you know where your margarita is? ↗

— Amy Neftzger

#drinking #friday #humor #humorous #margarita

I beg your pardon; I am drunk without a drink. English wine & words are vulnerable to every man. ↗

— Santosh Kalwar

#english #funny #man #vulnerable #funny

Gone are the days when girls used to cook like their mothers and boys used to dress like their fathers. Now girls drink like their fathers and boys dress like their mothers. ↗

— Habeeb Akande

#boys #clothes #clothing #cook #dress

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is Freedom, in water there is bacteria. ↗

— Benjamin Franklin

#humor #freedom

Alcohol is the anethesia by which we endure the operation of life. ↗

— George Bernard Shaw

#drinking #life

Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar. ↗

— Drew Carey

#humor #jobs #life #humor

Writer's block is a fancy term made up by whiners so they can have an excuse to drink alcohol. ↗

— Steve Martin

#humor #writing #humor

Drinking is fun! It makes me feel horrible and sexy! ↗

— Warren Ellis

#drinking #humor #humor

Are you there vodka? It's me, Chelsea. Please get me out of jail and I promise I will never drink again. Drink and drive. I will never drink and drive again. I may even start my own group fashioned after MADD, Mothers Against Drunk Driving, but I'll call it AWLTDASH, Alcoholics Who Like to Drink and Stay Home. ↗

— Chelsea Handler

#humor #humor

The Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy also mentions alcohol. It says that the best drink in existence is the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster, the effect of which is like having your brains smashed out with a slice of lemon wrapped round a large gold brick. ↗

— Douglas Adams

#drinking #humor #humor