#compute

...if you aren't, at any given time, scandalized by code you wrote five or even three years ago, you're not learning anywhere near enough ↗

— Nick Black

#funny-but-true #funny

Ask not, what you must do for your computer. Fear instead, what your computer can do to you. ↗

— with apologies to John F. Kennedy

#disaster #humor #humor

Don't explain computers to laymen. Simpler to explain sex to a virgin. ↗

— Robert A. Heinlein

#humor #sex #technology #technophobes #wit

As an orangutan cannot embrace higher mathematics or comprehend the architecture and operation of a computer, we humans __ so good at loudly proclaiming our intelligence and applauding our own doltish displays of cerebral gymnastics __ cannot begin to understand the true structure and functioning of the Universe. ↗

— John Rachel

#cerebral #computers #gymnastics #intelligence #orangutan

Technology offers us a unique opportunity, though rarely welcome, to practice patience. ↗

— Allan Lokos

#cell-phones #compassion #computers #internet #art

Young Programmer (innocently): Why are we signing up for this death march project, boss? Boss (thundering righteously): Because, it will increase our corporate earnings per share by a full 3.14159 cents!! ↗

— Ed Yourdan Death March

#death

If behind popular fascination with Freudian theory there was a nervous, often guilty preoccupation with the self as sexual, behind increasing interest in computational interpretations of mind is an equally nervous preoccupation with the self as machine. ↗

— Sherry Turkle

#equality

Yet the possibility of information storage, beyond what men and governments ever had before, can make available at the touch of a button a man's total history (including remarks put on his record by his kindergarten teacher about his ability and character). And with the computer must be placed the modern scientific technical capability which exists for wholesale monitoring of telephone, cable, Telex and microwave transmissions which carry much of today's spoken and written communications. The combined use of the technical capability of listening in on all these forms of communications with the high-speed computer literally leaves no place to hide and little room for privacy. ↗

— Francis A. Schaeffer

#computer #government #privacy #communication

I spend a fair amount of time on my computer, but I don't hack into anything. I have to open the manual and follow instructions. ↗

— Jason Ritter

#anything #computer #fair #follow #hack

I thank God for not making me a computer scientist. ↗

— Daniel J. Bernstein

#god #i #making #me #scientist