#condoms

I didn't eat." "What difference does that make?" "I'm not like you. I can't recharge by feeding off someone. I need food." "I know that! When was the last time you ate?" "Yesterday." "Yester--why the hell didn't you eat?" "We had to go buy condoms, remember?" "And you couldn't grab a sandwich on the way out?" he said hysterically. "I'm gonna die because you couldn't grab a sandwich? ↗

— Karen Chance

#food

Use a condom. The world doesn't need another you. ↗

— Carroll Bryant

#condoms #humorous-comebacks #insult #humor

There is a great deal of political pressure to only talk about abstinence, and to deny support for condoms and education on using them. This policy will lead to the unnecessary deaths of many people. ↗

— Hillary Clinton

#abstinence #condoms #deal #deaths #deny

She gave me money to buy condoms, and instead I bought a book of baby names. That’s life. That’s love. That’s fiscally irresponsible.
 ↗

— Dark Jar Tin Zoo

#baby #baby-names #birth #condoms #fiscally-irresponsible

I guess I had it made. My mother gave me advice - she taught me that women like to be looked in the eye - and my grandmother gave me condoms. ↗

— Usher

#condoms #eye #gave #grandmother #guess