#cupid

I pictured Cupid sitting in a crappy little bar, drunk and depressed, while he moaned to the bartender, "That Jasmine Parks, gods, she pisses me off! Did you see what she just did? Totally blew off this immortal stud to play kiss-the-boo-boo with a fickle little rent-a-cop. Why? 'Cause she's the biggest chickenshit on the planet! I'm ready to toss my bow and pick up a bazooka! ↗

— Jennifer Rardin

#relationships #immortality

What a woman should know -When to just let him zone out on video games, his computer, or phone. -When to let him control the day or situation. -When to just shut up and kiss him. ↗

— Jennifer Love Hewitt

#love

I can taste one sugar crystal, just like I can feel one Cupid (the metric unit of measurement for love).
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#love #measurement #metric-unit #sugar #taste

Cupid, you worthless bastard, I summon you to human form! (Julian) Gee, I can't imagine why he wouldn't respond to that. (Grace) ↗

— Sherrilyn Kenyon

#fantasy-lover #sherrilyn-kenyon #imagination

Even Cronus, the Titan who literally had his kids for breakfast, would find these facts hard to swallow. ↗

— Tai Odunsi

#greek-mythology #humor #mythology #percy-jackson-and-the-olympians #humor

I would have to break the ice with a warm smile that would melt her heart. ↗

— Tai Odunsi

#humor #love #olympus #percy #valentine

Occasionally someone or other got donked on the head by Cupid's arrow, and laughed, saying it's 'a definite sign', that 'it had to mean something'. One guy grabbed his girlfriend and lifted her up so that she was hit on the head by the arrow, and then said, 'There, now you've got no choice but to fall in love with me', and she laughed as he put her back down on the ground and kissed her mouth. ↗

— Gabrielle Williams

#love #love

…I bet Echo that she couldn't repeat the following line ten times fast:   Cupid's Academy counts kissing cousins as completed conquests cause his classes cunningly conspire unconscious couples to copulate and canoodle copiously. ↗

— Tai Odunsi

#greek-mythology #marriage #mythology #percy-jackson #wedding

I’ll tell you what love is. Love is walking up and down Archer Road in Gainesville, Florida and feeling like Cupid. Too bad the cops took issue with me hitch hiking with a bow and arrow. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #gainesville #humor #love #age

Since my trips to Earth, I've only managed to assemble a few basics facts about humans, condensing them in to four, overall points: kids got Reese's, teens got recess, adults got recessions, and seniors got receding. ↗

— Tai Odunsi

#greek-mythology #humor #mount-olympus #satire #valentines-day