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I don't have a sidekick - no Ed McMahon. So when I go out there, I'm lonely. It's scary.


Carson Daly


#go #i #lonely #mcmahon #out

I'm reserved, so I've always needed to find a way of opening up. Jazz helped me do that.


Renee Fleming


#find #helped #i #jazz #me

I stumbled into this format for 'Last Call with Carson Daly' that I really like, inspired by cable and Dave Attell's 'Insomniac.' I love being out on the street.


Carson Daly


#cable #call #carson #dave #format

I'm from California, but my father, who passed away when I was young, was from Newark. When I was kid, we would go back east and catch Yankees games. His side of the family are big Yankees fans. But, the real connection came in '97 when I moved to New York and became friends with the team.


Carson Daly


#back #became #big #california #came

There's nothing like being involved with a team that can go that distance.


Chuck Daly


#distance #go #involved #like #nothing

Did I ever tell you about the man who taught his asshole to talk? His whole abdomen would move up and down, you dig, farting out the words. It was unlike anything I ever heard. Bubbly, thick, stagnant sound. A sound you could smell. This man worked for the carnival,you dig? And to start with it was like a novelty ventriloquist act. After a while, the ass started talking on its own. He would go in without anything prepared... and his ass would ad-lib and toss the gags back at him every time. Then it developed sort of teethlike... little raspy incurving hooks and started eating. He thought this was cute at first and built an act around it... but the asshole would eat its way through his pants and start talking on the street... shouting out it wanted equal rights. It would get drunk, too, and have crying jags. Nobody loved it. And it wanted to be kissed, same as any other mouth. Finally, it talked all the time, day and night. You could hear him for blocks, screaming at it to shut up... beating at it with his fists... and sticking candles up it, but... nothing did any good, and the asshole said to him... "It is you who will shut up in the end, not me... "because we don't need you around here anymore. I can talk and eat and shit." After that, he began waking up in the morning with transparentjelly... like a tadpole's tail all over his mouth. He would tear it off his mouth and the pieces would stick to his hands... like burning gasoline jelly and grow there. So, finally, his mouth sealed over... and the whole head... would have amputated spontaneously except for the eyes, you dig? That's the one thing that the asshole couldn't do was see. It needed the eyes. Nerve connections were blocked... and infiltrated and atrophied. So, the brain couldn't give orders anymore. It was trapped inside the skull... sealed off. For a while, you could see... the silent, helpless suffering of the brain behind the eyes. And then finally the brain must have died... because the eyes went out... and there was no more feeling in them than a crab's eye at the end of a stalk.


William S. Burroughs


#burroughs #crazy #naked-lunch #equality

You've just got to focus on excellence and try not to be distracted by the news and the rumors and the absurdities of the stories that were coming out.


James Daly


#distracted #excellence #focus #got #just

I'm interested in playing old ladies because I am becoming one. And I want to become a very good one!


Tyne Daly


#because #become #becoming #good #i

You know, a lot of people say they didn't want to die until the Red Sox won the World Series. Well, there could be a lot of busy ambulances tomorrow.


Johnny Damon


#could #die #know #lot #people

People have the right to say what they want, but as long as I can go to bed at night and look myself in the mirror, I'll be all right.


Johnny Damon


#go #i #i can #long #look






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