#he

There's a boy who they call Pony! He's always acting gross and horny! He thinks he's got a lot down there, but he sure wears tiny underwear! ↗

— Cecily von Ziegesar

#humor

I did several interesting jobs, working in restaurants, I worked at a lab rat farm, feeding and watering all these rats. Then I got a full-time job as a technical writer for a large scientific research laboratory. ↗

— Kevin J. Anderson

#farm #feeding #full-time #full-time job #got

We Slytherins are brave, yes, but not stupid. For instance, given the choice, we will always choose to save our own necks. ↗

— J.K. Rowling

#slytherin #humor

I wanted the feel in these books to be like an epic fantasy, with kings, queens, dukes and court politics, but of course like what I was explaining before, about making the science make sense, you have to make the politics make sense, too. ↗

— Kevin J. Anderson

#before #books #course #court #dukes

Gallowglass returned to Sporrengasse with two vampires and a pretzel. ↗

— Deborah Harkness

#you-had-to-be-there #humor

The elevator doors opened on the first floor and Van Holtz was waiting there with several bags of groceries in his hands. “Oh. You,” he said. He started to walk in and, without thinking, simply reacting, Bo shoved him back out of the elevator by his head and hit the elevator button again. “You asshole!” Bo heard as the door closed. ↗

— Shelly Laurenston

#humor #shelly-laurenston #humor

Okay is BURSTING with sensuality ↗

— John Green

#the-fault-in-our-stars #humor

… she gave me a look that deftly combined tenderness with revulsion. To this day the memory of that look still visits me like a Jehovah’s Witness: uninvited and tireless. ↗

— Steve Toltz

#humor #relationships #humor

I think I speak for all of us when I say, "Huh? ↗

— Frank Beddor

#humor #the-looking-glass-wars #humor

Some people are used to having things done for them by her parents, I am not. I can do it myself. ↗

— Sally Pearson

#done #having #her #i #i am