#hum

Baby?" She perched beside him in the chair. "You're kidding me right?" "I was trying it out, no?" "no," she said firmly Simon & Clary ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#humor

That night was a dark day. Of course, all nights are dark days, because night is simply a badly lit version of day, ... ↗

— Lemony Snicket

#humor #night #humor

And you've got a boy right there who looks at you like he would drink your bathwater if you'd ask him! ↗

— Abbi Glines

#jax #ms-mary #humor

Mouth in gear, brain stuck in neutral. ↗

— Devon Monk

#humor

Scientists need to invent a way to make DNA work like in cartoons. ↗

— Ryan North

#humor #science #humor

As in music, when we hear the crescendo building, suddenly if the music stops, we begin to hear the silence as part of the music. ↗

— Chögyam Trungpa

#enlightenment #humor #music #silence #silent-music

One never realizes how different a husband and wife can be until they begin to pack for a trip. ↗

— Erma Bombeck

#humor

When you feel like throwing rocks, make sure they're ones no one can throw back. ↗

— Rebecca McKinsey

#boldness #humor #words #wordsmithing #humor

It was as if he grew his hair long and smoked cigarettes because he liked to, not because he liked being seen to. This was dangerously subversive. ↗

— Stephen Fry

#subversive #humor

Me: I think we should have sex again. Royce: Bad idea. Me: Why? Royce: I want more from you than sex. Me: Goodbye, you prudish bastard. ↗

— Gena Showalter

#humor