#iron

Mr. Bennet, how can you abuse your own children in such a way? You take delight in vexing me. You have no compassion for my poor nerves." "You mistake me, my dear. I have a high respect for your nerves. They are my old friends. I have heard you mention them with consideration these last twenty years at least. ↗

— Jane Austen

#hysteria #irony #nerves #sarcasm #respect

If the bee disappeared off the face of the earth, man would only have four years left to live. ↗

— Albert Einstein

#ecology #environment #science #science

But I've never even been to Olympus! Zeus is crazy!" Chiron and Grover glanced nervously at the sky. The clouds didn't seem to be parting around us, as Grover had promised. They were rolling straight over our valley, sealing us in like a coffin lid. Er, Percy ...?" Grover said. "We don't use the c-word to describe the Lord of the Sky. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#grover-underwood #percy-jackson #zeus #crazy

Simon turned to Jordan, who was lying down across the futon, his head propped against one of the woven throw pillows. "How much of that did you hear?" "Enough to gather that we're going to a party tonight," said Jordan. "I heard about the Ironworks event. I'm not in the Garroway pack, so I wasn't invited." "I guess you're coming as my date now." Simon shoved the phone back into his pocket. "I'm secure enough in my masculinity to accept that," said Jordan. "We'd better get you something nice to wear, though," he called as Simon headed back into his room. "I want you to look pretty. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#city-of-fallen-angels #date #funny #humor #ironworks

Dream Song of Thunders: Sometimes I go about pitying Myself, While I am carried by the wind Across the sky. ↗

— Frances Densmore

#irony #old-songs #transcendence #wind #dreams

That's the difference between irony and sarcasm. Irony can be spontaneous, while sarcasm requires volition. You have to create sarcasm. ↗

— Christopher Moore

#sarcasm #christ

God has, in fact, written two books, not just one. Of course, we are all familiar with the first book he wrote, namely Scripture. But he has written a second book called creation. ↗

— Francis Bacon

#god #scripture

Nobody can tell what I suffer! But it is always so. Those who do not complain are never pitied. ↗

— Jane Austen

#histrionics #hysterics #irony #mrs-bennett #suffering

Irony is wasted on the stupid ↗

— Oscar Wilde

#stupid #stupidity #stupidity

Thank you for sending me a copy of your book. I'll waste no time reading it. ↗

— Moses Hadas

#books #classic-insult #irony #literary-criticism #time