#is

Love is the magician that pulls man out of his own hat. ↗

I know that a man who shows me his wealth is like the beggar who shows me his poverty; they are both looking for alms from me, the rich man for the alms of my envy, the poor man for the alms of my guilt. ↗

— Ben Hecht

#beggar #both #envy #guilt #his

Listen, little boy. In this business, there's only one law you gotta follow to keep outta trouble. Do it first, do it yourself, and keep on doin' it. ↗

— Ben Hecht

#business #doin #first #follow #gotta

I wish my name was Brian because maybe sometimes people would misspell my name and call me Brain. That's like a free compliment and you don't even gotta be smart to notice it. ↗

— Mitch Hedberg

#brain #brian #call #compliment #even

You know when they have a fishing show on TV? They catch the fish and then let it go. They don't want to eat the fish, they just want to make it late for something. ↗

— Mitch Hedberg

#eat #fish #fishing #go #just

The depressing thing about tennis is that no matter how good I get, I'll never be as good as a wall. ↗

— Mitch Hedberg

#depressing #get #good #how #i

Do you think I am standing here, making this up as I go? I am sorry to disillusion you. I am not Robin Williams. I am the king of the pen. ↗

— Mitch Hedberg

#disillusion #go #here #i #i am

So I do have to work, you know, and I find as many movies and TV shows that I can, because otherwise I wouldn't have an income. ↗

— Tippi Hedren

#find #i #i can #i do #income

I wish I could play little league now. I'd be way better than before. ↗