#keri

riley: give me a romantic comedy any day. rhoan: your jest a girly-girl at heart, arent you? riley: takes one to know one, bro. ↗

— Keri Arthur

#humor #keri #masculinity #rhoan #riley

Why are you limping like that?' Nicholas demanded. I'm swaggering,' I informed him. You look like you're wearing a diaper.' Charming. And I had a crush on this guy. Wait. I had a crush on this guy? Now what?' he asked. 'You're making weird faces.' Nothing,' I said quickly. "Never mind. ↗

— Alyxandra Harvey

#crush #hearts-at-stake #humor #humor

We could have made it to the Arizona border in a few more hours if we hadn't been distracting each other with stupid little arguments. Don't get me wrong; I liked J.Lo fine. I've made that bed. But I'm not sure there's a person in the world I could be with twenty-four hours a day for three weeks without getting a little snippy. If I ever meet such a person, I'm marrying them. ↗

— Adam Rex

#humor #ideal-partner #marriage #humor

The first rule of intelligent tinkering is to save all the parts. ↗

— Paul R. Ehrlich

#intelligent #parts #rule #save #tinkering

There's nothing that can replicate the smoky flavor of char, so when I've got the hankering for it, I tell my wife that I'm taking care of dinner. I have three different types of barbecues - a coal, gas and smoker - so I can experiment a lot. ↗

— Guy Fieri

#care #coal #different #different types #dinner

Betrayal is an ironic thing. He or she betrays you then you betray yourself. You think you’re showing strength with your anger, but in reality, you’re showing how much you still care. ↗

— Shannon L. Alder

#betrayal #bickering #breakups #divorce #fights

Make a mess. Clean it up. ↗

— Keri Smith

#keri-smith #inspirational

Yeah, some of my college friends and I have been tinkering around for years, you know, just for fun. ↗

— Eric Roberts

#been #college #friends #fun #i

Virginia 's tax system needs to be fixed. The time to act is now. Do not send me any more studies. Do not send me another piecemeal approach that confuses tinkering with real reform. ↗

— Mark Warner

#another #any #approach #confuses #fixed

Van was feeding Christian as we walked in the door. I shielded my hands in front of my face to prevent from seeing her bare breast. "God damn woman, put that tit away!" "I'm feeding my daughter. You want another taste?" I started gagging immediately just thinking about how bad that shit tasted. "Hell no! I would rather eat dog shit. ↗

— Jennifer Foor

#family #funny #family