#ley

Some police forces would believe anything. Not the Metropolitan police, though. The Met was the hardest, most cynically pragmatic, most stubbornly down-to-earth police force in Britain. It would take a lot to phase a copper from the Met. It would take, for example, a huge, battered car that was nothing more nor less than a fireball, a blazing, roaring, twisted metal lemon from Hell, driven by a grinning lunatic in sunglasses, sitting amid the flames, trailing thick black smoke, coming straight at them through the lashing rain and wind at eighty miles an hour. That would do it every time. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#good-omens #humor #neil-gaiman #terry-pratchett #humor

Are you watching the boats?" Cornelia guessed. She craned her neck to see if there was any excitement on the river. Heavens no, I'm spying on people," Virginia responded unrepentantly. -Cornelia E and Virginia Somerset ↗

— Lesley M.M. Blume

#blume #boats #cornelia #escapades #humor

Emily smiled mischievously. "Your engagement was a rainy day occurrence? Afraid she would say no on a good day? ↗

— Devon Ashley

#humor #ordained #humor

No,” said Hermione shortly. “Have either of you seen my copy of Numerology and Gramatica?” “Oh, yeah, I borrowed it for a bit of bedtime reading,” said Ron, but very quietly. ↗

— J.K. Rowling

#hermione-granger #humor #out-of-character #quips #ron-weasley

Poker isn't all about the cards. Poker's mostly about attention. You got a woman whose legs are like yours, tits are like yours, hair is like yours and ass is like yours, all she's gotta do for me is sit there and half the men at the table won't be concentrating on their cards. They'll be thinking about your legs, tits, hair and ass, how much they want 'em and just what they'd do to get 'em." "I appreciate the compliment, Ty, but I don't think I'm all that." "You got a dick?" I felt my mouth twitch. Then I answered, "No." "Trust me ↗

— Kristen Ashley

#kristen-ashley #lady-luck #humor

Cleavage is great," she said. "Like an extra pocket. ↗

— Kelley Armstrong

#humor #kelley-armstrong #rae #humor

I'd turn and run but I'm anchored by two dudes that could hold the Titanic during a tsunami. ↗

— Karen Marie Moning

#humor #humor

Just hear me out. While you were napping, I was busy chatting up our allies. Didn't you know--your woman's a golden-tongued ambassador! My sisters always said I graduated from the shock-and-awe school of diplomacy, but joke 'em if they can't take a fuck, right? ↗

— Kresley Cole

#berserker #declan-chase #dreams-of-a-dark-warrior #immortals-after-dark #kresley-cole

In California, the state's huge dairy herd produces twenty-seven million tons of manure a year, the particulates and vapors from which have helped to make air quality in the argiculturally intensive San Joaquin Valley worse than it is Los Angeles. ↗

— Paul Roberts

#economics #environment #environmentalism #food #green

Heath had been there to help her, letting her draw from his strength. Did she have enough strength to sustain him in the same way? ↗

— Lisa Kleypas

#love-come-to-me #lucy #love