#m

That's very rude," Myrnin said. "I haven't brought my fangs our for some time. Not in mixed company, anyway. ↗

— Rachel Caine

#morganville #myrnin #vampires #humor

The look in Manny´s eye was the ocular equivalent of a middle finger... ↗

— J.R. Ward

#humor

They're a little strange, but I'm pretty sure neither of them is going to try to make me uncomfortable by stripping naked. ↗

— Suzanne Collins

#humor

A knock came at the door. Everyone looked up. Elena's nostrils flared and she leaned over to whisper something to Clay. "Fuck," he muttered. "Keep talking, Jaime. It's only Cassandra. She can wait. Forever, if we're lucky." "I heard that, Clayton," Cassandra said as she walked in. "Who the hell forgot to lock the door?" Clay said. "You were the last one in," Elena murmured. "Damn. ↗

— Kelley Armstrong

#humor #mistrust #humor

What i'm trying to tell you," Min said, "is that im going to grow up to be one of those chubby old ladies. It's in my genes. Like self raising flour. i'm going to pouf." "thats going to work out well for me," Cal said. "because i'm going to grow up to be one of those horny old men who chases chubby old ladies around the couch. ↗

— Jennifer Crusie

#love #humor

Eww," Jack said, and then giggled. "Yeah, and a Paris Hilton doll that had an optional brain."Aphrodite raised her brow at him. "Don't go all crazy. There are some things even Paris Hilton can't buy. ↗

— P.C. Cast

#humor

‎"If you want that kind of thing, call Nick. His advice is shit, but he really likes to give it. ↗

— Kelley Armstrong

#humor

Hello, my name is ees Lebkuchen Spice, and I vant to show you my coooooookies…. ↗

— David Levithan

#humor #humor

Did you know that ninety-eight percent of statistics are made up on the spot? ↗

— Kim Harrington

#humor

Smitty leaned forward, resting his arms on this raised knees. "I am fixin' to get mad, Jessie. "You're fixin' to get mad?" "Yeah." "Why don't you just get mad?" "I'm not there yet. But I will be if you don't start talking to me." Smitty to Jessie Ann ↗

— Shelly Laurenston

#humor