#mo

Those are brave men," he told Ser Balon in admiration. "Let's go kill them. ↗

— George R.R. Martin

#humor #humor

I should think this a gull, but that the white-bearded fellow speaks it; knavery cannot, sure, hide himself in such reverence. ↗

— William Shakespeare

#humor

No one is born a dancer. You have to want it more than anything. ↗

— Mikhail Baryshnikov

#humor #inspirational #humor

Well, I can't eat muffins in an agitated manner. The butter would probably get on my cuffs. One should always eat muffins quite calmly. It is the only way to eat them. ↗

— Oscar Wilde

#humor

Leaving?” she squeaked, bemused, as Max opened her wardrobe. “You’re abducting me?” “Eloping. Eloping involves hurried packing. Abducting involves masked men and a burlap sack. ↗

— Kate Noble

#humor

Warning: Contains old friends, old enemies, a dramatic cat rescue, soft drink references and a lot of teasing before the steamy sex. Readers are cautioned against drinking any beverage while reading to avoid accidental snorting or spraying of said beverages. ↗

— K.A. Mitchell

#k-a-mitchell #warning #humor

I turned to the Times crossword puzzle and asked Kate, “What’s the definition of a moderate Arab?” “I don’t know.” “A guy who ran out of ammunition. ↗

— Nelson DeMille

#humor

You need to play to your strengths as a couple. Sharing is really awesome when you're messing around with Play-Doh in kindergarten. It's less awesome when you're adults and one of you is good at something and the other person sucks at it. So just let the more skilled person take the reins. ↗

— Peter Scott

#marriage-advice #planning #humor

Each night I lie awake and stare up at the stars and think, what the hell happened to my ceiling. ↗

— Robert Paul

#humor

I have an idea," Cazio said after a moment. "What a lonely creature it must be. ↗

— Greg Keyes

#humor