#nic

Life is absolutely insane. Yes, life is insane but the great wisdom lies in choosing your insanity wisely. ↗

— Paolo Coelho

#paolo-coelho #veronica-decides-to-die #humor

Love is a winding mountainous road. Do you have an extra unicycle and handlebar mustache I can borrow?
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#humor #love #mountains #mustache #mustaches

Fortunately, he'd found that most people were easy to locate at five thirty in the morning. . ↗

— Patricia Briggs

#charles-cornick #cry-wolf #humor #morning #wake-up

You show me what someone listens to, I’ll tell you everything you want to know about his soul. (For instance, a bunch of Nickelback albums would have indicated he never had a soul in the first place.) ↗

— Tad Williams

#music #nickelback #soul #humor

When did this fiend strike last?" Ah . . . The last report was from the Dominican Republic. That was, let me see, two nights ago." Dominican Republic! Why in the world would he go there?" Exactly what I would like to know. ↗

— Anne Rice

#humor #humor

Huh? Oh you have a hidden agenda, do you?" She laughed. His straight-faced humor always surprised her. "You promised me you didn't." "There is nothing hidden about it," he replied. My objective is obvious. I've decided I'd rather have you describe me as 'sweet' than a 'slagging pain in the tailset.'" "Really?" "Well..." he looked up from the bag. "Maybe not in public." "I might be able to confine myself to saying it in private, if you gave me a reason." Taya met his eyes, and he blushed.

— Dru Pagliassotti

#flirting #nicknames #teasing #humor

If you don’t care about something, one way to demonstrate your feelings is to say the word and then repeat the word with the letters S-C-H-M replacing the first letters. Somebody who didn’t care about dentists, for instance could say ‘Dentist, schmentists. ↗

— Lemony Snicket

#lemony-snicket #schm #humor

Want to play hangman? asks Theophile, and I ache to tell him that I have enough on my plate playing quadriplegic. But my communication system disqualifies repartee: the keenest rapier grows dull and falls flat when it takes several minutes to thrust it home. By the time you strike, even you no longer understand what had seemed so witty before you started to dictate it, letter by letter. So the rule is to avoid impulsive sallies. It deprives conversation of its sparkle, all those gems you bat back and forth like a ball-and I count this forced lack of humor one of the great drawbacks of my condition. ↗

— Jean-Dominique Bauby

#conversation #locked-in-syndrome #repartee #communication

Our town was known for two things--no, three: salted fish, expertly dyed fabrics, and corruption. ↗

— Angela Elwell Hunt

#humor #satire #humor

Cuando haces una obra de caridad, on en mi caso de solidaridad, te sientes con derecho a ser como eres y tener lo que tienes. Ya pagaste tu impuesto, ¿ajá? ↗

— Xavier Velasco

#cynical #humor #humor