#non

If one unlabeled bottle holds nonfat milk, what does the second unlabeled bottle contain? If you answered “Whole milk” then you’re obviously not ready to receive a jug of my love. So I’ll just pour it in someone else’s coffee.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#label #labels #love #milk #nonsense

I love money. I love everything about it. I bought some pretty good stuff. Got me a $300 pair of socks. Got a fur sink. An electric dog polisher. A gasoline powered turtleneck sweater. And, of course, I bought some dumb stuff, too. ↗

— Steve Martin

#money #nonsense #rich #humor

Love will find you eventually, I guarantee it. That’s why you need to buy an invisible cloak from me for the one-time low price of $77,777.77. Offer valid for emotional invalids only. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#emotions #guarantee #invalid #invisibility #invisible-cloak

Love gives you wings. Icarus and the Challenger both had wings, and so did my first love letter, after I folded it up and flung it at my crush.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#challenger #crush #explosion #flung #icarus

I made myself an “I Love Jennifer” jacket out of my old “I Love Jenn” jacket. Two girls, one continuous love. The I Love Jennifer is a little off-center, but then so am I. Better than being self-centered, as my clone would probably say. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#clone #clothing #commitment #devotion #i-love-jenn

Love lets us ride on its back as if it were a camel. But you’ve got to water it, or it won’t grow into a healthy rose bush. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#health #healthy #love #nonsense #ride

Alysandir is a fine horseman," Isobella said. He was about to dismount, and she stepped upon a stool to get a better view. Just as she did so, he glanced toward the window in her direction. Sybilla gasped and brought her hand to her chest with an open-mouthed amazement. "Did ye see that?" Isobella did not want to be singled out, so she replied, "He was just being courteous." "Nae. He recognized ye in front of all and sundry," she said, with a shy smile that made her lovely grey-blue eyes shine as brilliantly as the golden locks of her hair braided on top of her hair. " I don't know why. I've been nothing but a thorn in his side." "That isn't what Alysandri said," Sybilla replied. "He was most full praise about ye." Isobella glanced at Sybilla, who smiled innocently, which was her way of letting her visitor know that that was all she was going to say on the subject. ↗

— Elaine Coffman

#isobella-douglass #scotland #love

The more we practice nonviolence in our words, thoughts and actions the more peaceful will be our inner state. ↗

— Amit Ray

#nonviolence #peace #love

Strangely enough as much as everyone believe’s I’m gay – and by now I probably am gay as may… Hana-chan was the first person I ever loved. ↗

— J.E. Haldeman

#non-book-quotes #saitou-fujiwara #street-team-quotes #love

When I first met Billy I thought about sucking his eyes right out of their sockets. They’re like turquoise gum drops. ↗

— Jo Treggiari

#fierce-ink-press #memoir #love