#or

I rushed us out of your parents' house because I didn't think I could manage two hours at the dinner table with everyone focused on Joe Loosey's joystick sitting in the refrigerator next to the applesauce. ↗

— Janet Evanovich

#joe-morelli #humor

If a human female was going to defeat a male alpha werewolf, there was only so many thing she could do to accomplish that feat. All of them were batshit. ↗

— Heather Killough-Walden

#lily #humor

...now and then a giggling trail of mermaids appeared in our wake. We fed them oatmeal. ↗

— Tove Jansson

#mermaids #oatmeal #sailing #humor

Reality itself is too twisted. ↗

— Hunter S. Thompson

#humor

What I want to write about has changed somewhat, and the scope of the storytelling has changed accordingly. ↗

— Terry Brooks

#accordingly #changed #i #scope #somewhat

Il est plus facile de désintégrer un atome qu'un préjugé ↗

— Albert Einstein

#humor

The practice of thrift is not outdated. We must discipline ourselves to live within our incomes even if it means going without or making do. The wise person can distinguish...between basic needs and extravagant wants. Some find budgeting extremely painful, but I promise you, it is never fatal. ↗

— Marvin J. Ashton

#helpful #humor #humor

Magdalena pulls me away by the arm. “I am the stronger one of Titus and I,” she says over the marketplace din. “Woman are always the stronger sex.” She smiles to herself. “The trick is not appearing to be so. ↗

— Lynn Cullen

#lynn-cullen #sex #women #humor

Todos creemos en el país, lo que no se sabe es si a esta altura el país cree en nosotros. -Mafalda. ↗

— Quino Joaquín

#política #humor

I've got six months to sort out the hackers, get the Japanese knotweed under control and find an acceptable form of narcissus. ↗

— Jasper Fforde

#humor #humor