#ore

normal person's weekly chore list: 1. clean kitchen. 2. clean bathroom. 3. clean entire rest of domicile. cleaning impaired person's weekly chore list: 1. don't get peanut butter on sheets. ↗

— Dave Barry

#cleaning #humor #slobs #humor

I wanted the feel in these books to be like an epic fantasy, with kings, queens, dukes and court politics, but of course like what I was explaining before, about making the science make sense, you have to make the politics make sense, too. ↗

— Kevin J. Anderson

#before #books #course #court #dukes

I'm Liam of Erinthia. I'm here to rescue you ... And You are not Cinderella. You are a tree branch wrapped in a sheet ↗

— Christopher Healy

#folklore #humor #prince-charming #humor

Never let the things you can't do, stop you from doing what you can. ↗

— Ronald Reagan

#humor

Listen, do you really expect me to believe that God lives beneath the Vatican?- Ezio Auditore ↗

— Oliver Bowden

#ezio-auditore #humor #humor

Humor is something that thrives between man's aspirations and his limitations. There is more logic in humor than in anything else. Because, you see, humor is truth. ↗

— Victor Borge

#anything #aspirations #because #between #else

I can rap in a London accent, make weird faces, wear spandex, wigs, and black lipstick. I can be more creative than the average male rapper. ↗

— Nicki Minaj

#average #black #creative #faces #i

This continent, an open palm spread frank before the sky. ↗

— James Agee

#continent #frank #open #palm #sky

I rushed us out of your parents' house because I didn't think I could manage two hours at the dinner table with everyone focused on Joe Loosey's joystick sitting in the refrigerator next to the applesauce. ↗

— Janet Evanovich

#joe-morelli #humor

I am as frustrated with society as a pyromaniac in a petrified forest. ↗

— A. Whitney Brown

#am #forest #frustrated #i #i am