#ow

You will evolve past certain people. Let yourself. ↗

— Mandy Hale

#evolve #friends #friendship #growth #letting-go

I want to be a cowboy, but only long enough to barge into a saloon and bellow, "Who's the yellowbelly that stole my happy trail? ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#cowboy #funny #happy-trail #humor #saloon

Be ruthless about protecting writing days, i.e., do not cave in to endless requests to have "essential" and "long overdue" meetings on those days. The funny thing is that, although writing has been my actual job for several years now, I still seem to have to fight for time in which to do it. Some people do not seem to grasp that I still have to sit down in peace and write the books, apparently believing that they pop up like mushrooms without my connivance. I must therefore guard the time allotted to writing as a Hungarian Horntail guards its firstborn egg. ↗

— J.K. Rowling

#j-k-rowling #writers #writing #writing-inspiration #funny

It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's The impurities in our air and water that are doing it ↗

— Al Gore

#stupid #wow #funny

Today is your special day, even if today might be tomorrow to an Australian. And even though you’re not Australian, it doesn’t negate the fact that today may or may not be tomorrow. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #motivation #today #tomorrow #funny

I have studied the astrological musings of the mystics, and I can conclude one thing: of all things cosmic, bowling is the best. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bowling #cosmic #funny #musings #mystic

The police called it choking, but I called it a two-handed neck hug. That’s how I knew she really loved me. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#attempted-murder #authorities #choke #choking #crime

An anniversary is the perfect time to celebrate all the missed opportunities to correct a mistake, and even take vows to renew it. ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #love #marital-vows #funny

How'd you get to be so good at this?" "I had a good teacher." "Better not have been Myrnin or I'll have to kick his predatory ass." "I mean you, dummy." "Oh. ↗

— Rachel Caine

#funny #ghost-town #humor #morganville-vampires #myrnin

My parents always said that knowledge was the best gift they could give me, probably because they were too cheap to buy me Christmas or Birthday presents. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#cheap #christmas #funny #knowledge #funny