#pig

I have a skin disorder that destroys the pigmentation of my skin, it's something that I cannot help, OK? ↗

— Michael Jackson

#destroys #disorder #help #i #ok

Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 40, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year old waitress. Ladies, I apologize. For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?", here's an update for you. Nowadays 80%of women are against marriage. Why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage! ↗

— Andy Rooney

#cows #marriage #men #pigs #sausage

We live in an age when unnecessary things are our only necessities. ↗

— Oscar Wilde

#paradox #truth #wisdom #age

If I say you're a goatherd's son, you say, 'Yes, Lord Ralon.'" Alanna gasped with fury. "I'd as soon kiss a pig! Is that what you've been doing-kissing pigs? Or being kissed? ↗

— Tamora Pierce

#anger #humor #insult #pigs #anger

It is (to describe it figuratively) as if an author were to make a slip of the pen, and as if this clerical error became conscious of being such. Perhaps this was no error but in a far higher sense was an essential part of the whole exposition. It is, then, as if this clerical error were to revolt against the author, out of hatred for him, were to forbid him to correct it, and were to say, "No, I will not be erased, I will stand as a witness against thee, that thou art a very poor writer. ↗

— Søren Kierkegaard

#art

The great periods of our life occur when we gain the courage to rechristen what is bad about us as what is best. ↗

— Friedrich Nietzsche

#courage

It’s a dove, an attractive girl, a winning card in poker, take your pick. You’re my Pigeon. ↗

— Jamie McGuire

#attractive #dove #pigeon #poker #travis-maddox

I realize that a writer's business is setting fire to Piggy Sneed-and trying to save him-again and again; forever. ↗

— John Irving

#failing #failure #piggy-sneed #save #saving

But if you tell folks you're a college student, folks are so impressed. You can be a student in anything and not have to know anything. Just say toxicology or marine biokinesis, and the person you're talking to will change the subject to himself. If this doesn't work, mention the neural synapses of embryonic pigeons. ↗

— Chuck Palahniuk

#impressed #pigeons #self-absorption #student #synapses

Seventeen, eh!" said Hagrid as he accepted a bucket-sized glass of wine from Fred. "Six years to the day we met, Harry, d’yeh remember it?" "Vaguely," said Harry, grinning up at him. "Didn’t you smash down the front door, give Dudley a pig’s tail, and tell me I was a wizard?" "I forge’ the details," Hagrid chortled. ↗

— J.K. Rowling

#dursley #hagrid #harry-potter #humor #pig