#pol

It's all very well to put the government in the hands of the perfect man, but what do you do when the perfect man gets a bellyache? ↗

— David Eddings

#politics #humor

Your Excellency, I have no need of this hypothesis. ↗

— Pierre Laplace

#atheist #god #humor #mathematics #napoleon

Our listeners asked us: "What is chaos?" We're answering: "We do not comment on economic policy. ↗

— John Vaillant

#economic-policy #humor #radio-call-in-shows #russia #humor

What does Karl Marx put on his pasta? Communist Manipesto! ↗

— Stephen Colbert

#politics #humor

Obama is not a secret Kenyon, or a secret Muslim, he's a secret Republican. ↗

— Bill Maher

#politics #president-obama #humor

Indeed, when I came to Italy, I expected to encounter a certain amount of resentment, but have received instead empathy from most Italians. In any reference to George Bush, people only nod to Berlusconi, saying","We understand how it is - we have one, too. ↗

— Elizabeth Gilbert

#george-bush #humor #italy #politics #humor

The problem with the Tea Party is they're all ignorant hillbillies who drink moonshine and ride around on mules. And they believe in stereotypes too. ↗

— Jon Stewart

#politics-of-the-united-states #humor

It’s a truism in policing that witnesses and statements are fine, but nothing beats empirical physical evidence. Actually it isn’t a truism because most policemen think the word ‘empirical’ is something to do with Darth Vader, but it damn well should be. ↗

— Ben Aaronovitch

#police #humor

America’s been ruined by one word: Bankers. No, two words: Bankers and lawyers. Make that three words. Add politicians to that list. Oh, and don’t forget the lobbyists. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#banksters #humor #lawyers #lobbyists #politicians

Bob Dole revealed he is one of the test subjects for Viagra. He said on Larry King, 'I wish I had bought stock in it.' Only a Republican would think the best part of Viagra is the fact that you could make money off of it. ↗

— Jay Leno

#politics #republicans #humor