#red

Man, Grandma, what big hair you have." "The better to style with, my dear. ↗

— Neal Shusterman

#fairy-tales #funny #hair #red-riding-hood #funny

Manfred,” I began, exasperated, “I just don’t know what to do with you.” “I have some very good ideas,” he said. He waggled his eyebrows. He was making it funny, but he was serious. I never doubted that at my slightest response, Manfred would be booking us into the nearest hotel as fast as he could whip out his wallet. ↗

— Charlaine Harris

#manfred #funny

Going to jail is the failure of the individual to realize his limitations as a criminal. Recidivism is the failure of his friends to compensate for those limitations as a team. ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #humor #jail #prison #redicivism

Courage is the art of being the only one who knows you're scared to death. ↗

— Earl Wilson

#being #courage #death #knows #only

I feel the color in my cheeks rising again. I must be the color of The Communist Manifesto. ↗

— E.L. James

#anastasia #anastasia-steele #blush #communist-manifesto #e-l-james

I hate Risk. I have for many years now. I hate that you still like Risk. I hate that you guilt me into playing with you because no one else will. I hate that you do the accents of the countries you’re attacking from. And I hate that you wear a beret every time we play. God, do I hate the beret. ↗

— Colin Nissan

#funny #hatred #humor #risk #funny

Ivanov: Once I worked hard and thought a lot but I never got tired; now I do nothing and think of nothing, but I'm tired in body and spirit. My conscience aches day and night, I feel deeply guilty but I don't understand where I am actually at fault. And add to that my wife's illness, my lack of money, the constant bickering, gossip, unnecessary conversations, that stupid Borkin... My home has become loathsome to me and I find living there worse than torture. ↗

— Anton Chekhov

#tired #torture #whining #home

Brad Green, almost overnight, became the poster boy for the common Wall Street tale - proving once again that greed, most definitely, kills. Giving away about 99% of his fortune was also front page news, but Green barely blinked at having to scrape by with only $200 million. The government seized all five of his homes, his three boats, two jets, a helicopter, 14 cars, and all of his assets except the $200 million he stashed for a rainy day in an offshore bank account. ↗

— Phil Wohl

#redemption #wall-street #home

Come on, it is a guest bedroom! If you want your guests to feel at home, they should be allowed to do whatever they do at home! ↗

— Daniele Lanzarotta

#imprinted-souls-series #nicholas #shattered-souls #vampires #home

After being maligned for his lack of offense for much of his career, [César] Gerónimo batted .280 with two home runs, a triple, three runs, and three RBIs vs. Boston during the 1975 World Series, and then he batted .308 with two doubles, two steals, and three runs vs. New York during the 1976 World Series. The man who’s defense Sparky Anderson called 'ungodly' became an offensive star on baseball’s biggest stage. ↗

— Tucker Elliot

#cesar-geronimo #cincinnati-reds #home