#romance

I tried to think of something to say. Excuse me? Hello? Marry me? Anything would have done. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#humor #romance #sadie #humor

I dodged behind Mac for cover and refused to take the bait. I glanced at my nonexistent watch. 'Oops, look at the time. Guess I have to be going now. Let's not do this again sometime, okay?' Before I could move, Pritkin was there, jamming the medallion into the skin of my upper arm.'Ow!'He looked at me expectantly. I glared at him. 'That hurt!' What do you see?' A big red mark, ↗

— Karen Chance

#fiction #humor #romance #supernatural #vampire

the one that can hurt you the most are the one that you really love ↗

— Salman Aditya

#inspirational #romance #humor

As I nodded and smiled and umm-hmm'd and oh, my'd my way down the drive, I wondered if boys had any sort of magazine that told them how to attract women and, if so, did it ever tell them to put the girls' interests first? ↗

— Jennifer Donnelly

#romance #humor

Gotten butt-ass, bone-dog naked for your vadge-cam?" Dante offered with an angelic smile, standing close. "Fucking hell, D." Griff turned to Beth with an apology, but she spoke first. "Huh-yeah. Thanks, cockbreath. ↗

— Damon Suede

#gay-romance #humor #humor

I'm a big believer in first impressions," he finally said. "Tell me what your first thought was when Jason walked into the courtroom." Taylor took a sip of her drink and grinned. This one was easy. "I vowed to hate him forever." Jeremy's brown eyes twinkled at this. "That's exactly what I said nineteen years ago, five minutes after he first walked into our dorm room. ↗

— Julie James

#humor #romance #humor

I wouldn't yell 'fire' at that slimeball if his ass was in flames. ↗

— Victoria Dahl

#romance #humor

I chose the path less traveled but only because I was lost. Carry a map. - Phoebe Traeger ↗

— Jill Shalvis

#romance #humor

I’m out of health potions. Retreat! Retreat! Give me some of your health potions!” I screamed. “I don’t have any potions. Run, bitch, run,” Brody squealed. The red ran out on my health and my assassin was transported, stripped of everything we’d earned, back to the starting camp. “I’m dead! Fuck, they killed me! ↗

— Kristen Ashley

#romance #humor

Snowball?" It's white." Meow." It's so girly." This from a guy who named his poodle Princess." his laughter died. "How do you know about Princess?" Your sister told me. ↗

— Rachel Gibson

#humor #romance #humor