#sci

I was on the floor. "Um, a little help?" Christopher put his hand down. Martini cleared his throat and Christopher's hand retracted. "I can handle it, thanks." "There's nothing amorous about pulling someone off the floor," Christopher muttered. "There is when I do it. ↗

— Gini Koch

#humor #sci-fi #humor

Conscience is like a pet: If you spoil it by too much attention it'll start yipping at the most inopportune times. ↗

— Connie Brockway

#conscience #humor #humor

Don't pick up hitchhikers!"- D. Adams ↗

— Robert Lynn Asprin

#science-fiction #humor

The Theist tells us that the truth is god exists, the Atheist tells us that the truth is there is no god, while the truth tells us we don't know. ↗

— Kodai Okuda

#knowledge #philosophy #religion #science #wisdom

I’m not bipolar, I’ve just had a bipolar life foisted upon me. ↗

— Daniel O'Malley

#humor #sarcasm #scifi #humor

I walk up and down the rows. The heads look like rubber halloween masks. They also look like human heads, but my brain has no precedent for human heads on tables or in roasting pans or anywhere other than on top of a human bodies, and so I think it has chosen to interpret the sight in a more comforting manner. - Here we are at the rubber mask factory. Look at the nice men and woman working on the masks. ↗

— Mary Roach

#science #humor

The thin girl was gulping down one of Richard's bananas in what was, Richard reflected, the least erotic display of banana-eating he had ever seen. ↗

— Neil Gaiman

#science-fiction #humor

Nothing in the universe can travel at the speed of light, they say, forgetful of the shadow`s speed. ↗

— Howard Nemerov

#science #humor

If you've never been in a dumpster coated with industrial waste while someone stabs you with a piece of sharpened rebar, then you probably wouldn't understand. ↗

— S.G. Browne

#sci-fi #humor

Do I really run like that?" (Kitty) "Yup," Martini confirmed. "Don't worry, I think it's sexy." "Thank God. I think I look like a cheetah on drugs. ↗

— Gini Koch

#humor #sci-fi #humor