#si

The only way I won't be re-elected is if I were found in bed with a dead girl or a live boy. ↗

— Edwin Edwards

#politics-louisiana #humor

When I was a kid we played cowboys and Indians, and I always wanted to be an Indian when I grew up. ↗

— Ville Valo

#cowboys-and-indians #games #grow #humor #pursue

I believe in evolution in the sense that a short-tempered man is the successor of a crybaby. ↗

— Criss Jami

#belief #clever #comparison #control #crying

Most of the pack would rather have Darryl mad at them than Auriele. ↗

— Patricia Briggs

#darryl #humor #mercy-thompson #silver-borne #humor

The joke was that President Bush only declared war when Starbucks was hit. You can mess with the U.N. all you want, but when you start interfering with the right to get caffeinated, someone has to pay. ↗

— Chris Kyle

#american #bush #caffeine #coffee #humor

You‟re my mate. Think you can handle that?” It was hard to speak with her heart bursting open. “Think you can handle me?” “So long as you're gentle with me.”" Emmett to Ria - Whisper of sin ↗

— Nalini Singh

#love #nalini-singh #humor

There is, after all, no pleasure like that given by a woman who really wants to see you. ↗

— Anthony Powell

#insightful #poignant #humor

In one scene, when I was supposed to say, "In a pig's eye you are," what came out was, "In a pig's ass you are." Old habits die awfully hard. ↗

— Ava Gardner

#humor #improvising #night-of-the-iguana #swearing #humor

Why don't you find out for yourself? Then you'll see the glass, hidden in the grass. ↗

— Morrissey

#life #lyrics #music #humor

But then it was over too quickly and they pulled away. She knew they couldn't stand there and kiss like a couple on the run in a thriller. ↗

— Joss Ware

#humor #romance #sage #simon #stereotype