#soccer

...I've spent the last fifteen years of my life railing against the game of soccer, an exercise that has been lauded as "the sport of the future" since 1977. Thankfully, that future dystopia has never come. ↗

— Chuck Klosterman

#future #humor #soccer #sports #humor

When I meet a European, the first thing I say is, “I’d much rather watch football than football.” But I’m just teasing them, and they know I’d really rather watch football than football. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#europe #european #football #soccer #absurd

I really want to try soccer after I retire because I've watched football over the years and I think I could be a good contender. ↗

— Usain Bolt

#because #contender #could #football #good

The people of Cleveland hate soccer. But it's my favourite thing and I follow the U.S. men's national team around when they play whenever I can. ↗

— Drew Carey

#cleveland #favourite #favourite thing #follow #hate

Kung fu and soccer are the two things that I was most interested in as a child. ↗

— Stephen Chow

#i #interested #kung #kung fu #most

Liberal soccer moms are precisely as likely to receive anthrax in the mail as to develop a capacity for linear thinking. ↗

— Ann Coulter

#capacity #develop #liberal #likely #linear

I used to go to my kids' soccer games and I was the only parent who wasn't screaming, because I'd have to do a show that night. It was hard. Moms and dads get more emotional at those soccer and Little League games than at a professional game. ↗

— Neil Diamond

#dads #emotional #game #games #get

I think foosball is a combination of soccer and shish kabobs. ↗

— Mitch Hedberg

#i #i think #soccer #think

I was a keen sportsman, and became school captain in soccer and cricket. ↗

— John E. Walker

#captain #cricket #i #keen #school

I played at the Sainte Maxime Beach Soccer Tournament, which was brilliant fun as usual. ↗

— David Ginola

#brilliant #fun #i #played #soccer