#um

We're taught that in life, we should try to look on the bright side. Not in this case. In this case, assume rejection first. Assume you're the rule, not the exception. It's liberating. But we also know it's not an easy concept. -He's not just into you ↗

— Greg Behrendt

#greg-behrendt #he-s-not-just-into-you #humor #humour #love

Pulling the chair out for me, he invited me to sit. I stood there wondering if I could sprint for the nearest exit. Stupid strappy shoes, I'd never make it. He leaned in close and whispered in my ear, "I know what you're thinking, and I'm not going to let you escape again. You can either take a seat and have dinner with me like a normal date," he grinned at his word choice, "or," he paused thoughtfully then threatened, "you can sit on my lap while I force-feed you. ↗

— Colleen Houck

#kelsey #love #ren #dating

All those men who end up disappointing you. After a while, you don't even want to have feelings anymore. You just want to get on with your life. ↗

— Candace Bushnell

#disappointment #feelings #life #men #numb

He looks like a runway model. How in the world am I going to be able to reject that? The world is so unfair. Seriously, it's like turning Brad Pitt down for a date. The girl who could actually do it should win an award for idiot of the century. ↗

— Colleen Houck

#humor #sex-appeal #dating

I’d love to create a personal profile on a dating site with a headline that reads, “Great Listener Seeks Mute Woman. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#dating #funny #humor #one-liner #ridiculous

I like pink." Lucius sniffed. "It's just red's sorry, weak cousin. ↗

— Beth Fantaskey

#pink #dating

Fortunately, among werewolf women, the word "bitch" is not offensive. I was having a lot of fun with that. "Hey there, bitches!" I called as I came through the door. "What are my favorite bitches up to today? ↗

— Molly Harper

#bitches #humor #vampires #werewolf #werewolves

First Pallas and now you,” the gray-haired man said, shaking his head at Nick. “It’s like I’m running a goddamn dating service around here. ↗

— Julie James

#mike-davis #dating

Language is not only the vehicle of thought, it is a great and efficient instrument in thinking. ↗

— Humphry Davy

#great #instrument #language #only #thinking

Trust everybody, but always cut the cards. ↗

— Finley Peter Dunne

#humor